Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ @SamdSwift
Joined October 2013-
Tweets2K
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Followers187
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Following168
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Likes35K
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
I like exercise names like “Romanian deadlift” or “Bulgarian split squat.” The addition of an Eastern European country adds a certain gravitas. I’m gonna invent something called the “Moldovan pushup”
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Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
i take thee, killatrav
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
if the ribbon is pink, breast cancer aware. if the ribbon is blue, pig at state fair
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Secular version of Islamic prayer
Secular version of Islamic prayer
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Otis but the beat is E.B.I.T.D.A.
Otis but the beat is E.B.I.T.D.A. https://t.co/YvQ5ze89VU
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
I’m always saying this
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Asking the 17 year old stocker if they carry this in a men’s XL
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Devil on my shoulder: it’s Friday night. Have 7-10 beers. Come on do it 😈 you know you want to 😈 Angel on my shoulder: only have 3-5 beers
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
me too sentient hot dog
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Hey man. I know you and Bobo were rivals, but he died in an accident. Thought you'd wanna hear Clown: Oh no. What happened? Falling piano. Right on the head Clown: Oh, man. Damn. (long pause, intrigued) Did his teeth...? Yeah. Piano keys. The entire set Clown: (wistful) Ah
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Mashallah New England has its own Kaaba
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
The Rizzler told Theo Von his biggest regret in life was a Fortnite match he lost. Based af.
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Just got my class schedule, lmk if we have any of the same classes
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
Buttermilk Jesus 🥛✝️ retweeted
(Telling everyone an Olympic Swimmer sucks now) He’s dried
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