Dan @dannylem0n

ruh roh Manc/Notts Joined November 2011

Tweets

2K
Followers

102
Following

282
Likes

827

Wesley @WesleyBout

3 weeks ago

Went to get a Covid test and a giant broccoli man walked by the door

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N I M B ❂ @Nimbopill

4 weeks ago

Standing behind the plumber like this the whole time he’s fixing the toilet

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Brooks Otterlake @i_zzzzzz

a month ago

When you ask Mr. Hammerhand to look after your 300 walnuts while you go grab lunch

Massimo @Rainmaker1973

a month ago

When you ask Mr. Hammerhand to look after your 300 walnuts while you go grab lunch

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Frank Owen's Legendary Paintbrush🥀🇵🇸🇱🇧🇾🇪 @OwenPaintbrush

2 months ago

Because Bob Vylan's real name is Pascal, they're calling him a "posh, vegan poet" to discredit him. If his real name were Dwayne, they'd be calling him a "violent, inarticulate thug". And if his real name were Ahmed, they'd be demanding his deportation. That's how it works.

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the heart @Fredward3948576

2 months ago

There’s a nonzero chance that I lose control and rip your limbs off your body the second you get close to me, but sure man, get in this elevator. Roll the dice

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shawntilly lace @sh_wnee

3 months ago

my landlord is having some kind of emergency

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Andrew @Dub__A

3 months ago

The eternal question

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Jhonny ⚹٭ @JhonnyWhite69

4 months ago

Fit so hard I had to gatekeep it

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sam y’all @samiamrosenberg

4 months ago

I only threw this Nathan 4 You

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Adso Of Belk @AdsoOfBelk

5 months ago

3000 BC black mirror episode, a man drowns in a Mesopotamian irrigation ditch

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the heart @Fredward3948576

5 months ago

Girl, you’re like a bucket of chicken [slipping into a British accent] and a rather large plate of beans

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DavidOsland @DavidOsland

5 months ago

How badly will the £12.21 an hour minimum wage damage British business? With me in the studio to discuss this are a £91,000 a year Tory MP, a £200,000 a year rightwing journalist and a chief executive on £4.2m.