scriptfighter @scriptfighter2
Improv nerd! Lvl 24 comedy is my lifeblood, and blood is my blood blood. Joined October 2022-
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scriptfighter retweeted
Guess who wrote this headline? I'll give you a hint, me :)
Guess who wrote this headline? I'll give you a hint, me :)
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scriptfighter retweeted
I do my best work when blinded by rage
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DUDE CORNER: Any Room at Girl Dinner for This Male Feminist?: ow.ly/VH9N50PutH9
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Not built for hard labor. I have the hands of a Victorian girl locked away in a tower
scriptfighter retweeted
Look, the options were: get a therapist, or start a podcast. And therapy's expensive. That's why Better Help makes it easy to... (1/76)
scriptfighter retweeted
Yeah, I'm anti-woke. (sleepy all the time)
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Have to be chill today. Not my choice. Court-ordered.
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Some unhinged man executed someone yesterday via chokehold and all the newspapers are framing it like: Homeless Man Found Dead In Marine's Arms
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A group of white men is called a Podcast
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Oh, im needy? Yeah, needeep in PUSSY
scriptfighter retweeted
When the group instructor says 'good job' they're referring to me
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If someone you meet says they have a zest for life get ready to get love bombed
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I would be the worst person to travel back in time. If I got transported to the 1950's I'd say: "we have this thing called wifi" and they'd ask "what's wifi" and I'd just be like "I have no idea"
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Why aren't I losing weight if I've cut my daily hot dog intake by half?
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*takes long drag of cigarette at the ceremony*: "I do I guess."
*takes long drag of cigarette at the ceremony*: "I do I guess."
scriptfighter retweeted
Please get this woman to Zelensky 🙏
Please get this woman to Zelensky 🙏
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Breaking the glass ceiling? This woman fell through the roof
scriptfighter retweeted
Wow. I finally got famous on twitter. And you know what? Everything changed. I feel happier, my skin cleared up, my lawyer called, they said the charges got dropped. I told him to counter sue and he didn't mimic my voice like usual. He just said 'yes, sir.' Life is good :)
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