Angry Cubicle @AngryCubicle
Comedian and angry office dweller. The Dark Side of the Cube Joined September 2012-
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400lbs dude told me he thinks he's got a problem... because his first tattoo healed and he already wants another one. #BigCanvASS
Potluck tomorrow! I'm bringing a bowl of mayonnaise with a serving spoon in it.
Wasn't long after I started working that I realized why some people decided they'd rather suck dicks for a living.
Just got an email that someone left their car door open in the parking lot. I'm currently Googling how to hot wire a Jetta.
I can tell when corporate is having a meeting because our receptionist is always dressed like a hooker on her first day of work.
I just spoke to a black customer named Latina. Her parents have failed us all.
Ever since I found out it was possible, I've been trying to hit someone with the heavy wooden door to the bathroom on my way out.
Just realized the janitor here probably has enough dirt on everyone here to end all their marriages.
The fat obnoxious Asian lady in the office is wearing a white sweater that makes her look like the Michelin man.
Been dumping customer calls on other departments all day 'cause Hey, we're a team and they're supposed to pick up my slack, right?
Customer search is down. I've been telling customers it's due to hurricane Sandy. We're nowhere near the east coast.
One of the few hot chicks we have is wearing a skeleton Bodysuit. Is it still sexual harassment if I ask to jump her bones?
With all the fake scars and bruises. Today would be ideal to beat the shit out've someone.
Today is our Halloween costume party, I'm thinking about no-showing my shift and claiming my costume was the invisible man.
Spent all day today emailing the dumbest girl in the office pictures from the 2011 Japanese Tsunami and telling her it's Hurricane Sandy.
Card readers, email, and the intranet is down. The office is slowly turning into a scene from Revolution.
They waxed the bathroom floors last night. Now they're so shiny you can see the reflection on the floor of people taking a shit. #YOLO
I've yet to see a wheelchair big enough to justify our handicapped bathroom stall being big enough to park a monster truck in.
#NoteToSelf When I quit this place, remember to rig my desk with all sorts of Home Alone-esque booby traps.
"So wait. You're hitting me with a late fee just because I'm late making my payment" #CustomerQuote #47DaysLate
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