Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

Momma👩‍👧‍👧•MST💉🏨•hobby farmer and gardener🌱👩‍🌾• lover of coffee&sunshine Joined May 2020

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

3 years ago

Yesterday I was like “YEAH. I’m going to download a dating app for a little confidence boost!” And then…I remembered this is no longer for a confidence boost, this is truly one of my only options I have left. And THEN. I cried. Lmao.

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

3 years ago

Well, well, well if it isn’t little miss disappears from Twitter for six months because she’s *happy*, back again and unhappier than evaaaaa

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Emm☀️ @EmWarthman23

4 years ago

I love how when I finally stand up for myself and don’t allow certain behaviors a man is so quick to remove himself from the conversation. Well honey, watch how quick I remove myself from the entire situation✌🏼

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

Both. I need both.

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

Never underestimate the therapeutic qualities of screaming “FUCK” into a pillow as loud as you can.

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Janet Forklift @janetforklift

4 years ago

I’m the absolute baddest bitch. So many things I’m baddest at. Math? Got held back a grade for that shit. Cooking? Microwaved leftover pizza for 11 minutes. Socializing? Was so anxious at a party I threw up on someone.

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

Just so everyone in Walgreens knows, I was NOT there to “buy medication for my butthole” like my 9 year old announced. I was there for ibuprofen for my headache that these children give me daily.

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Sara Buckley @nottheworstmom

4 years ago

Every 30 something white woman when Eminem rose up to the stage

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Sara Buckley @nottheworstmom

4 years ago

When I realize my kids are watching me throw it in a circle during the halftime show

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

I just caught Amelia picking up the cat and sneezing into it like a tissue and wiping her booger nose across its back. So I think I’m done parenting for the day already.

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Hayls❤️ @Hayyls_16

4 years ago

Who even has good mental health when working in the medical field? 😂🤦🏼‍♀️

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

Xoey: what can we do while we have no power Me: I used to like bird watching and identify bird breeds when I was little Xoey: alright, well you were also weird and had no friends. So.

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

No power since yesterday at 4:30 and the road is blocked every direction with down power lines and trees. When I said I needed a break from the world and to stay home I didn’t mean as a result of a natural fucking disaster but ok lol

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

Is there any worse feeling than getting to the gym and realizing you forgot to charge your damn headphones and now they’re dead

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

Xoey: “I’m going to freak out.” Me: “We both can’t freak out at the same time and I already called dibs on today. So you have to wait your turn.” Xoey: *sighs* “fine. Continue with your meltdown.”

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Anna Keyes @AnnaKeyes3

4 years ago

“I hate how in movies the girl and the boy just walk up to each other, start singing, and fall in love. It doesn’t work like that. If a boy walked up to me and started singing to me, I’d punch him in the face.” - My eight year olds hot take on Disney movie romances