Dad Jokes @DadJokesssss
Terrible Dad Jokes. Funny Farm Joined January 2024-
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If, at first, you don’t succeed… Then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.
Don’t challenge Death to a pillow fight. Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushions.
What’s the last thing to go through a fly’s head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour? Its butt.
I'm trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but it's really hard to find good players
I'm so good at sleeping. I can do it with my eyes closed.
Dad-activities. Either way, it’s a Good Friday.
Remember this. The difference between an old bus station and a lobster with breast implants is one's a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.
I spent a lot of time, money and effort childproofing my house … but the kids still get in.
The trouble with getting to work on time is that it makes the day so long.
Why aren’t cats good dancers? Because they have two left feet
@DadJokesssss What kind of math to geeks in California love? CAL-culus !!
Why was the baby strawberry crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? Envelope.
I was wondering why the bus was getting bigger, then it hit me.
My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something
Susan - wears a mask .. @susanwfd
423 Followers 2K Following Ramblings and musings of an introvert Here for the conversation but rudeness gets you blocked and reported. life is too short to deal with idiots.
Warren Richardson @CDNinIA
6 Followers 47 Following
Abubakar Ahmad Ahmad @ahmad_aliyakbar
4 Followers 55 Following Just your random guy from the audience
moremi @moremi1070898
33 Followers 769 Following
Scott Miller @wartheroriginal
52 Followers 128 Following
Michael 🎵 @Just_mykeldre
350 Followers 2K Following Field service engineer, lover of Everything good, music fanatic, bringing peace wherever it is welcome
freshstyleshirts @SahanaPOD
714 Followers 3K Following Welcome to my world of creativity! https://t.co/NApbg3lIvS https://t.co/SIiMm6mptV
Ed Christy @EdChristy
18 Followers 50 Following
Lucas DeLuca @thetacoramenman
4 Followers 164 Following
Karen @KayEee1919
11 Followers 79 Following
miguel @miguelgurrola91
3 Followers 91 Following
Zain ♜ @ZainCMYK
2K Followers 1K Following
makena @makena3918
6 Followers 155 Following
Ashley Boa @BoaAshley86020
1 Followers 5 Following
Scott Meyer @ScottMeyer34241
0 Followers 1 Following
Kevin G Friedman @kevinfriedman
555 Followers 887 Following Realtor with Coldwell Banker Key Biscayne; Artist Jeweller, product developer, Citizen of the World, and Frankli Wild about Life
408pharoah @408pharoah
20 Followers 123 Following
Bob A Licious @BobDaMan4real
350 Followers 179 Following
Sahara Rider @SaharaRider2
32 Followers 970 Following
The Chaplain Writer @ChaplainWriter
14 Followers 246 Following Account of Jim Leary, a Chaplain who loves to write. Author of “Embracing Gethsemane: Navigating Life’s Darkest Moments” (Order Via Link)
Stephen Ponder @StephenPonderMD
2K Followers 413 Following I'm a pediatric endocrinologist practicing in Texas with 57 years of personal experience living with type 1 diabetes. Tweets are my own.
Malcolm @malrobpayne
14 Followers 44 Following
Ninad Dighe @ndninad
30 Followers 71 Following
The Batman 🦇 @thejokerzlaugh
36 Followers 638 Following I am the Batman, i am the shadows, you should fear me.
andyken78981 @andyken789811
157 Followers 595 Following Just a guy aspiring to be a web dev and a True Blue Evertonian COYB
Cassie Pitts @Cassie_0185
0 Followers 34 Following
Dave @amortition
325 Followers 308 Following Yup I’m me. if you are looking for sarcasm you have come to the right place. All my animal science facts are Bllshit.
Patrick McKinnon @dpmckinnon
33 Followers 179 Following
Joseph Anthony @joseph_a_n
71 Followers 196 Following
chance @chance20814364
12 Followers 36 Following
Josh Roy @1e87719be3924a7
1 Followers 8 Following
A Gotay @AlexanderGotay
848 Followers 1K Following
KI @JK69655
80 Followers 331 Following Cats, airplanes, aviation/ATC safety, ATC@ZAU, NATCA, weather, other stuff in the sky, travel, & music.
Vlade @Vlade_Vuk
140 Followers 391 Following
Paul Morgan @Morganpaul001
3 Followers 140 Following
Robert Law 🛡️ @RahBlah214
33 Followers 38 Following
Udo Obike David @UdoObike3406
177 Followers 1K Following
Yohannes Tegete @y_tegete
1 Followers 25 Following
Carol Garland @GarlandCarol
1K Followers 5K Following
⚔️🛡Mordorgeist.. @mordorgeist
456 Followers 803 Following Dad, USMC Veteran, Gamer, #SWTOR RP Fan Fiction Writer & Custom Armor Designer for the best community #swtorfamily #swtwt
WTFIGO @WTFIGO2022
71 Followers 337 Following
Dad-activities. Either way, it’s a Good Friday.
@DadJokesssss Wow I got a retweet from dad jokes That's a first!
@DadJokesssss What kind of math to geeks in California love? CAL-culus !!
Ok, this one IS good😉
As a kid I was made to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog.
@DadJokesssss Love it 🥰 Currently she’s sulking. Standard.
LOL
Why do teenagers travel in groups of threes and fives? Because they can’t even
@DadJokesssss @HazelApplesauce
Man ran away from “girl 🍆”
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