Databae @DatabaeOfficial

My views are my own and do not reflect those of my employer. Livermore, CA Joined August 2017

Tweets

259
Followers

17
Following

408
Likes

926

Databae @DatabaeOfficial

6 years ago

IT: have you tried turning it off and back on again? User: Yes <lie> IT: if I come to your computer, turn it off, back on again, and it works, I’m turning off your Facebook access *five minutes later* User: Everything works again

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Databae @DatabaeOfficial

6 years ago

When the pug doesn’t understand Blue Green Red Green Blue and keeps releasing after a wipe

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Databae @DatabaeOfficial

6 years ago

When you personal assistant loses her head, your dog gets shot in the neck, your nephew is acting like a fool with his friends and they didn’t add extra foam on your skinny vanilla latte

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Databae @DatabaeOfficial

7 years ago

What if the night king is Ned Stark getting his revenge

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Databae @DatabaeOfficial

7 years ago

By the end of the day! #Management

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Databae @DatabaeOfficial

7 years ago

[OPINION DISPLAYED] >[Conflict with own routine/TIMEWASTER] Result-(Emotion [Anger]) {Response formulating...} Your opinion causes me [anger], stop hating it doesn't affect you [suffix internet acronym #67288]

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Databae @DatabaeOfficial

7 years ago

After winning in overtime

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Randalltime @RandallTime

7 years ago

If the Cleveland Cavaliers win the 2018 NBA finals I’ll buy everyone who retweet’s this a jersey...

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Databae @DatabaeOfficial

8 years ago

Son: Dad, why is my sister’s name Violet? Dad: Because your mother loves Violets Son: Thanks dad Dad: No problem, Overwatch

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Lord Cup @jewcup

8 years ago

why is no one talking about the aliens over Milwaukee this week

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Kurt Kohlstedt @KurtKohlstedt

8 years ago

Meanwhile, in Philadelphia: a play in three acts.

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Ben Shapiro @benshapiro

8 years ago

Everybody in America would have chipped in $5 to pay security to stand aside

Law&Crime Network @LawCrimeNetwork

8 years ago

Everybody in America would have chipped in $5 to pay security to stand aside

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ESPN Esports @ESPN_Esports

8 years ago

And that's how they do it in Philly. @PHL_Fusion took down @NYXL in a shocking upset. We got you the best plays here: espn.com/video/clip?id=…

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Noam Blum @neontaster

8 years ago

Actually the mic doesn't drop. The microphone and the Earth both move towards each other, but the Earth moves far less than the mic does due to the difference in mass.

Neil deGrasse Tyson @neiltyson

8 years ago

Actually the mic doesn't drop. The microphone and the Earth both move towards each other, but the Earth moves far less than the mic does due to the difference in mass.