N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

Classicist with interests in ancient literature. Tutor in several capacities. Oxford, England Joined May 2016

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

2 hours ago

I look forward to spending my fifties finding the perfect demented confidence to share with strangers in transport termini. A provisional effort: 'I used to fill my pockets with custard but then the State took control and now I sweep up in a tyre shop just out of town.'

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

a day ago

An AI has just complimented me on my 'strategic mindset', which is perhaps flattering but not obviously true.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

5 days ago

Though not all depraved people wear cagoules, it is impossible to wear one and look other than depraved. I have just seen a muttering deviant walk past, freshly cagouled, on his way to interfere with a capybara.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

6 days ago

Once again I spent Monday morning in Leisured Bachelor mode. A magnificently Concerned Citizen staggered out of a bank and held my eyes opprobriously as she veered past. She will make Calls, and by nightfall they will have put me in some kind of supervised Unit for my safety.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

2 weeks ago

My Weltanschauung fell off thirty years ago, almost to the day. I am now in my late forties. How shall I spend my fifties?

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

2 weeks ago

A taxi driver has just explained to me in detail that the Russians control the weather. #wisdom

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

2 weeks ago

Never suppose that middle-aged evenings are without passion and excitement. At 11pm local time I am watching a professional YouTuber with a large beard undertaking huge eating challenges.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

3 weeks ago

Advice to the young from a fortysomething: Those who do *not* abruptly start screaming in a bus station and get carted away by muscular people under heavy sedation have not viewed human nature with a steady, honest gaze. #perspective

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

3 weeks ago

I can now report that misreading 'determined' as 'demented' makes obituaries much more fun.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

3 weeks ago

There is an old song by the Kinks about lazing on a summer afternoon. #mood

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

4 weeks ago

Whoever is trying to sell me 'game changing gym equipment' needs to work on their targeted marketing. The last time I moved seriously rapidly was a couple of years ago, when I was most recently attacked in the street.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

4 weeks ago

Summer is deliciously warm in England, too warm even to consider going forth to share demented confidences with strangers. Perhaps I should sit in an ice bath and thence explain to radio phone-in shows, if they still exist (?), that aliens are interfering with my ketchup.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

a month ago

I am delighted to report that someone is trying to sell me ‘prefabricated homes for the elderly’, 60 sq. m. in size. #targeted #marketing

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

a month ago

SR just noticed on his morning walk a pork-faced plebeian man looking most appraisingly at him. All complacent bachelors present an immediate social care emergency. No doubt he will make calls, and by nightfall I shall be in some kind of supervised unit for my safety…

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

a month ago

I am always pleased to receive dubious invoices from dodgy Americans. The question raised by their latest attempt is whether 'storage analysis', for which they charge hundreds of dollars, implies: They have hacked my data...? Or: They have been looking through my wardrobe...?

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

a month ago

Solitary diners face their own dilemmas. A young man twenty feet away has taken a dislike to me. Should I go over and offer to show him my favourite tomato, kept in my breast pocket for the purpose?

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

a month ago

SR is in a small town bus station at time of writing, so the one question is what kind of demented confidence he should share with strangers. Perhaps: 'Some boys came and taped my hamster to the ceiling but I'm stronger than them.' Detail is so important.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

a month ago

Life after forty-five is essentially a search for the ultimate deranged confidence to share with strangers in bus stations. ‘I didn’t shave the hamster so the state has revoked my custard privileges.’

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

a month ago

My latest press letter is in today’s Telegraph, on the subject of historic pub crawls.

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N.J. Sewell-Rutter @SewellRutter

2 months ago

It is a warm evening in the dog days. The natural thing for an aged roué to do after midnight is, of course, watch a video of a gentleman in Polynesian costume assembling a gaming pc from its component parts.