Relationships should be 50/50. I break off our engagement, you leave me for 8 years to earn your fortune at sea
To everyone who replied to this with a “half agony, half hope” joke, please don’t be funnier than me on my own tweets or they’ll fire me. Thanks!
@SparkNotes Relationships should be 50/50. You break off our wedding, I sit in my wedding dress at the wedding table for the rest of my life, while raising a girl to wreak havoc in revenge.
@SparkNotes Relationships should be 50/50. The night of our wedding the monster I created strangles you and I vow vengeance upon it
@SparkNotes I could be persuaded to enter such a relationship. ... ...I'll see myself out.
@SparkNotes I lack the literary context for this and still enjoy it
@SparkNotes I'm still partial to this version because RPJ is so pretty.
@SparkNotes Relationships should be 50/50. You take my leg off; I lead an entire ship full of men to their deaths in an obsessive quest for revenge.
@SparkNotes Relationships should be 50/50. I surmise a giant fortune and host numerous parties in an attempt to win you back, and you cry over my shirts and commit a hit-and-run that I take the blame for.
@SparkNotes Relationships should be 50/50. You marry me, I run out of our wedding night bedroom covered in your blood and possibly a little insane, whilst either speaking Scottish or singing Italian. I have range! You... Are dead...
@SparkNotes It's better than burning his things and then throwing yourself into the fire because he has to go back home
@SparkNotes As long as everyone involved knows that there's a 50/50 chance, that it will be too late and that such precious feelings will be gone forever. ❤💔❤
@SparkNotes Captain Wentworth and Anne Elliot in Jane Austens' Persuasion
@SparkNotes Oh, I thought this was referring to The Great Gatsby 😬
@SparkNotes They should be. Then someone hogs all the poison not leaving a drop and all you get is his dagger.
@SparkNotes Excellent tweet - you’ve persuaded me!
@SparkNotes Welp, that's tonight's telly sorted out.
