Tweeetmebad @Tweeetmebad
Nobody likes an actual slut, just a slutty mind. favstar.fm/users/tweeetme… Joined April 2011-
Tweets5K
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Followers3K
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Following282
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Likes66K
If it's any consolation, you looked fucking amazing during your meltdown.
People make me sick, unless you cook them properly.
I'll ask for nudes from cartoon avi's IDGAF.
Calm down, things that require two hands.
I definitely wasn't prepared for a pit stop. You know, tampon wise.
When the chicken tastes like beef, you know you're on a winning streak.
The worst thing about Easter is getting the dog shit picked up in time.
Hey butch chicks, we know it's easier dressing like a boy when you can't afford it.
I heard a kid on the playground call another kid a "Fart-Towel" I don't know what it means, but I'm gonna be using it from now on!
People that have simple solutions for everything. Just no.
Whenever hubz pisses me off, I leave the dildo's in an upright position in our hiding place so he knows I've been using them without him.

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