Steve Miller @_spacekowboy
Anya is my dog. She will bark at dogs on TV. And horses, and monkeys, and anything that doesn't look right. Joined April 2015-
Tweets39
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Followers11
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Likes20
Raisin bran and Cheerio mix is surprisingly awful.
No seriously, where's my plate? #beaglelife
I never feel more guilty than when Anya watches me eat a Drumstick ice cream. I DONT BEG TO LICK YOUR TEATS! Oops, meant treats. #beaglelife
I raised millions of dollars for a campaign illegally #NowImInPrison OOPS! That's not really bad enough to go to jail for, my bad!
Disney's Sebastian told me, "Just do what the music say!" DJ played 'Come on Eileen', #NowImInPrison
Tore the tag off my mattress. #NowImInPrison tearing the tag off my mattress.
Thank you Anya for alerting me to a dog being in a commercial at 3am. Heaven knows the whole neighborhood needed to know that. #beaglelife
#ThingsJesusNeverSaid I'd help you but then you'd never learn to help yourself
#ThingsJesusNeverSaid build a water slide and use it as a tax write off. #ripsamkinnison
I only look at Twitter for the pictures of Kate Upton in the bath.
I just want whatever it is you are eating. #beagle
Who's going to win a date with @Pittgirl92 tonight in the DCT? YOU! 10:00 with @CIABakersfield! #LAICF ioimprov.com/west/show/cia-…
Getting ready at St. Paul's. @CIABakersfield #improvislife
Ready to have some fun at Gus' Garage!
Guy crying in airport bar, "I hate to fly, I hate to fly." Finished his drink, put on his pilots hat and left for his gate. #AirportFail
Marcy @m_hamilton33
243 Followers 3K Following
Wonda @wonda74alton
1K Followers 3K Following
Carlin Jones @CarlinJones
760 Followers 4K Following When you fill your life with positive thoughts and feelings, you’ll find that guilt, resentment, and any negative feelings will leave you.
Robert @SalinasRob89
5 Followers 21 Following
Reso Lotions 🇮🇱... @TrivagoD
7K Followers 5K Following Daughter of Holocaust survivor. Truth lover. Zealous Zionist. Hapless anti Kroll investigator. Seriously silly person when not prostrate w/outrage etc.
BoredFox @Boredfox
162 Followers 237 Following I can hold a cigar and look confused while staring at an ipad. I am a human tornado, it's hard to explain. He/Him
Catbird Seat at the r... @Cotu
417 Followers 1K Following Genuine solutions require realism and pragmatism, not just idealism and emotion. Me at the cartesian XYZ of everything With You Dead Reckoning to the future
Dee Dee Jessee @DDneedsanap
157 Followers 827 Following I once sang smelly cat while cleaning out the litter box. My kids have never seen Friends, so they think I am a genius.
Meatloafers🥩👞 @NolanIsCorrect
144 Followers 242 Following BLM • he/him • scabigail grace stan • theatre is the dopest dope • true crime/unnecessary conspiracy theories are a beloved pastime • I make coffee
Centerforimprov @CIABakersfield
149 Followers 269 Following The CIA is dedicated to all things funny. Anything can happen at a CIA show!
DeeDee Jessee @DeedeeJessee
19 Followers 107 Following
Rachael @DirtyMindedMinx
24K Followers 65 Following I'm a seemingly normal, suburban mom with inappropriate fantasies that I can't risk sharing with my husband.
Hillary Clinton @HillaryClinton
30.4M Followers 959 Following 2016 Democratic Nominee, SecState, Senator, hair icon. Mom, Wife, Grandma x3, lawyer, advocate, fan of walks in the woods & standing up for our democracy.
Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump
109.6M Followers 53 Following 45th & 47th President of the United States of America🇺🇸Trends for United States
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