des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

the panic is attacking me wonderland Joined November 2012

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

5 days ago

i am starting to think that maybe my cats might be fat…. will i still be taken seriously as a cat groomer if i have fat cats????? they might gotta diet or i might lose my credibility they’re gonna be so upset at me

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

4 weeks ago

i will never understand how my birth giver was teaching me finger flow before i finished kindergarten but then was disappointed i started raving after hs like miss ma’am look in a mirror before asking me why i turned out the way i did

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

3 months ago

i absolutely adore collecting black hills gold pieces. are they expensive? nope. are they valuable in a resale market? not really. is it super sentimental for reasons most wouldn’t understand? yes absolutely so i add a piece whenever possible

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

3 months ago

i wish my fav dive bar sold their prickly pear margs in cans i need a couple for this new episode of love island

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

3 months ago

i feel really bad for everyone’s animals tonight and also very blessed that not one of my four animals gives a damn

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

3 months ago

i overestimated my dogs intelligence left him home for 1.5 hours w a level 2 (of 5) treat puzzle and he didn’t get not even a single part of it figured out i feel humbled

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

3 months ago

im two episodes into love island and so far i am loving how messy huda is she was made for reality tv truly

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

3 months ago

people assume that bc i made a career out of cat grooming that i must also be uneducated and i really REALLY need ppl to stop playing in my fucking face like that. i will embarrass you.

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

4 months ago

the cousin closest in age on my maternal side is having a kid i have officially made it to the final 3

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

4 months ago

the dichotomy of tucson is so funny to me bc there’s a strong undercurrent of community and helping your neighbor but also don’t honk in traffic cuz you might get shot at

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

4 months ago

always swore i would never live in or near phoenix but the job postings for cat groomers i see up there are a lil too tempting some days

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

4 months ago

fights in a relationship after almost a decade together are HILARIOUS cuz why am i pouting that this man was driving bad this morning LMAO im gonna have to apologize goddamn it

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

5 months ago

who gave orange cats the audacity

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des🌵 @actuallywtfdes

5 months ago

called my mil yesterday and ended up in HER small local community’s fb page where they’re uncovering fraud in the city council bc the mayor is up for election god bless that woman she WILL make sure I know ALL the drama she does