Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

All the best dad jokes from http://t.co/SW5xqsNgAE reddit.com/r/dadjokes/ Joined February 2015

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Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

My favourite teacher at school was Mrs. Turtle Strange name but she tortoise well.. ift.tt/2MgDxPW

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

My stoner friend used my daily planner to roll up a joint… He’s now high on my list of priorities. ift.tt/2OUE2RS

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it... ... then my illegal logging operation is a great success. ift.tt/300ZJ3P

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

I'm throwing a party for people who fail to orgasm. Let me know if you can't come. ift.tt/33z6dJi

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

My friend asked me if I wanted to hear a really good Batman impression, so I said go on then. He shouted, “NOT THE KRYPTONITE!” and I said, “That’s Superman…” “Thanks, man, ” he replied, “I’ve been practising it a lot.” ift.tt/2MewqaB

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Robin: Hey Batman, the Batmobile won't start Batman: Did you check the battery?Robin: What's a tery? ift.tt/2Z4Vjrk

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Hookers don’t fart, they let out little prosti-toots No text found ift.tt/2Z5yzeI

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

My dolphin puns are terrible on porpoise. No text found ift.tt/2OWaZgP

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Why did Sherlock Holmes go to the mexican restaurant? He was looking for a good case-idea. ift.tt/2z9rz25

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

How many apples grow on trees? All of them. ift.tt/2OR0GdD

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Shout out to my grandma... Thats the only way she can hear. ift.tt/31BwnsX

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

I was gonna get a brain transplant. but the I changed my mind. ift.tt/33xmkXW

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

I ate a clock last week. I had difficulty passing time. ift.tt/2Z3vKqx

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Would anyone be interested in being my companion? Asking for a friend. ift.tt/2ZVOklH

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Never marry a tennis player. Love means nothing to them. ift.tt/2N3PxE5

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Eye drops are technically blinker fluid It does indeed exist ift.tt/2OWM50k

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

To the man in the wheelchair that stole my camouflage jacket You can hide but you can't run. ift.tt/2ySo2oC

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

When is a door not a door? When it's ajar! Source: My dad ift.tt/2MeClMQ

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Have you heard the news about Orions belt? Scientists are saying it's a waist of space..Sorry.. That was a three star joke. ift.tt/2YVjbla

Dad Jokes by dadbot @dadbot2000

6 years ago

Police were called to a day care to investigate a 3yo who was refusing to take a nap They charged him with resisting a rest ift.tt/2YM13uS

if u need something tell me

🏪🚀

its_UrJioAli🚀 @SkyHighFunCf

2K Followers 3K Following if u need something tell me 🏪🚀

César @ceTolSa

9 Followers 103 Following

Husband, Parent, Grandparent, Parrothead, EMD...Just another squirrel trying to get a nut.

Michael DeThorne @shuckmaster

79 Followers 488 Following Husband, Parent, Grandparent, Parrothead, EMD...Just another squirrel trying to get a nut.

No matter where I go you know it is me by the Yin & Yang Orb on my Belly.

Yin Yang The Dutch An... @YinYangTheDAD

364 Followers 2K Following No matter where I go you know it is me by the Yin & Yang Orb on my Belly.

Nothing special. I'm just a normal person.

Neza Megloc @nezameglic31

7 Followers 71 Following Nothing special. I'm just a normal person.

just a regular guy looking to have fun age:24 gender:male

young kiryu @that_boi_von

41 Followers 554 Following just a regular guy looking to have fun age:24 gender:male

am norman Like F1, Ice Hockey, Fan of St Louis Blues, Most music, likes to laugh . I have too many hobbies and Interests. Doesn't include fans only or cam view

Itsmenorman @Itsmenorman5

446 Followers 1K Following am norman Like F1, Ice Hockey, Fan of St Louis Blues, Most music, likes to laugh . I have too many hobbies and Interests. Doesn't include fans only or cam view

Positive accounts make a happy timeline. Will rt every tweet to spread the vibes

Only Happy accounts @HappyTimline

1 Followers 42 Following Positive accounts make a happy timeline. Will rt every tweet to spread the vibes

pants are an illusion and so is death

🌾🐌🌱 @KoradeMatt

30 Followers 217 Following pants are an illusion and so is death

Nichole Middleton @RevCoco_tweets

2 Followers 23 Following

Nils Østbjerg @NilsyDK

10 Followers 76 Following

Born & raised in the great state of Maine. Father, tax accountant, & die-hard Boston sports fan. Proud American of Greek heritage. #LGB. Expect anything here.

Tom Nicholas 🇺🇸... @TomNicholas529

819 Followers 2K Following Born & raised in the great state of Maine. Father, tax accountant, & die-hard Boston sports fan. Proud American of Greek heritage. #LGB. Expect anything here.

frank white @DJXtraLarge

66 Followers 559 Following

☯️Popilè /hit maker ☯️

🇭🇹SI YO VLE �... @JEANMAC67321948

156 Followers 4K Following ☯️Popilè /hit maker ☯️

Lego inspired Neyland Cricket Club nutjob. Husband to a wonderful wife, father to 2 fantastic kids, has a cat called Felix Legion.

Jason Milne @ymlaenneyland

420 Followers 3K Following Lego inspired Neyland Cricket Club nutjob. Husband to a wonderful wife, father to 2 fantastic kids, has a cat called Felix Legion.

Raising Masculine Men With Spartan Discipline, Resilience And Mental Toughness For Succeeding At Elite Levels.

Bish @MariageFragrnce

441 Followers 5K Following Raising Masculine Men With Spartan Discipline, Resilience And Mental Toughness For Succeeding At Elite Levels.

Callum Grieves @CallumGrieves1

9 Followers 59 Following

DevOps engineer for https://t.co/qChP7cLpYU at @ChildrensPhila, author/instructor @Pluralsight and @DevIntelligence
All opinions (And typos) are mine

Chris is probably som... @devbyaccident

313 Followers 882 Following DevOps engineer for https://t.co/qChP7cLpYU at @ChildrensPhila, author/instructor @Pluralsight and @DevIntelligence All opinions (And typos) are mine

A family man struggling with low wages looking for the path forwards

Did @Didicois

1K Followers 2K Following A family man struggling with low wages looking for the path forwards

pls like all my tweets i'm begging u -- she/her

emma🕺✨ @emrosef

92 Followers 161 Following pls like all my tweets i'm begging u -- she/her

NuclearBandAid @NuclearBandAid

29 Followers 217 Following

I'm not very good at life nor many things for that matter, except Apex for some reason.

Huhguh @Huhguh21

42 Followers 159 Following I'm not very good at life nor many things for that matter, except Apex for some reason.

TravTravTrav @TravTravTrav1

1 Followers 11 Following

The Defeat MSA Awareness Shoe (501c3) is on a marathon to raise awareness RE: Multiple System Atrophy (MSA). #KickMSA #DefeatMSA #DeFeetMSA; https://t.co/0nLoVqFJOz

Defeat MSA Awareness ... @MSAshoe

857 Followers 4K Following The Defeat MSA Awareness Shoe (501c3) is on a marathon to raise awareness RE: Multiple System Atrophy (MSA). #KickMSA #DefeatMSA #DeFeetMSA; https://t.co/0nLoVqFJOz

Husband, Father, Music Judge, Video Critic, Lover, Personality Promoter, Professional Sounding Board, Animal Impersonator, Possible Human

Carbide Affectus @MrLinc

242 Followers 479 Following Husband, Father, Music Judge, Video Critic, Lover, Personality Promoter, Professional Sounding Board, Animal Impersonator, Possible Human

Computer Janitor

Matt Harlum @LIV2

253 Followers 243 Following Computer Janitor

(They/them) cosplayer/artist/social worker👍 Loves Nintendo, boba, otome games, Harvest Moon, and NYANKO SENSEI❤ banner by @myunppa

Marjo, MSW@Otakon @marjocarpenter

128 Followers 334 Following (They/them) cosplayer/artist/social worker👍 Loves Nintendo, boba, otome games, Harvest Moon, and NYANKO SENSEI❤ banner by @myunppa

ifwu @castle261

11 Followers 361 Following

Stage & Production Manager / Designer. There's always money in the banana stand. I don't have a banana stand.

Kurt Dangle @ImGoinToJackson

221 Followers 1K Following Stage & Production Manager / Designer. There's always money in the banana stand. I don't have a banana stand.

John Tydings @njgolfguy

53 Followers 1K Following

Jameel @ThatGuyJameel

43 Followers 125 Following

Shaina Allysa Dionisi... @ShainaAllysa

2 Followers 60 Following

Emerald Eradicator @Emerald122343

5 Followers 113 Following

The finest restructured meat product ever. Follow us. Pic: Ruocaled https://t.co/WwJ5OWsseB under CC 2.0

Rib Tips @TastyRib

569 Followers 3K Following The finest restructured meat product ever. Follow us. Pic: Ruocaled https://t.co/WwJ5OWsseB under CC 2.0

Wendy Traynor @traynor_wendy

8 Followers 82 Following

charl0tt3 @charl0ttemari3

44 Followers 593 Following waitingforhelp

Peter @pedrohawkins

6 Followers 15 Following

Christian, husband, father of 3, 🏌️, @elonuniversity alum, @LFC supporter, investor, CFA, CFP®, tweets ≠ advice

Jason Forsythe @jcforsythe

76 Followers 1K Following Christian, husband, father of 3, 🏌️, @elonuniversity alum, @LFC supporter, investor, CFA, CFP®, tweets ≠ advice

integrity and intelligence ar written on my forehead

Gorata Julliet @goratamolatlhe2

25 Followers 79 Following integrity and intelligence ar written on my forehead

Music, Xbox, Films and Binge Watching is how I spend my time in this universe....

👻 JACK 👾 @JackMarcus_

2 Followers 22 Following Music, Xbox, Films and Binge Watching is how I spend my time in this universe....

Hydrology is the name, clean water is the game.

ingrid cary @ing4red

37 Followers 605 Following Hydrology is the name, clean water is the game.

b a s i c a l l y M E

Ishvel Anne Padilla @IshvelPadilla

39 Followers 63 Following b a s i c a l l y M E

Daren Williams @daisykeren

7 Followers 79 Following

You won't see me in the movies I worked on, unless you watch the DVD Extras.
All my tweets are my own but I will deny them vehemently...

F64club @TheRealF64Club

87 Followers 216 Following You won't see me in the movies I worked on, unless you watch the DVD Extras. All my tweets are my own but I will deny them vehemently...

Assia @glizorpok

2 Followers 137 Following

let us find the best deal for your pet so you can sit back and relax

Pet Deals @petdeals777

349 Followers 371 Following let us find the best deal for your pet so you can sit back and relax

BabyTrene @Rene_614

136 Followers 293 Following lmaoooo

Mix a bit of Snob with huge lot of Yuppie with a pinch of Bogan and thats me.

TJ @SkankinT

9 Followers 103 Following Mix a bit of Snob with huge lot of Yuppie with a pinch of Bogan and thats me.

Anime world cup

Roshed Arkani @arkani_roshed

27 Followers 131 Following Anime world cup

lauren aaliyah wade @cheesecake12123

0 Followers 22 Following

Anthony @toninho_william

7 Followers 70 Following

Mariejoseph @stephval205

6 Followers 62 Following

Marcos Gutierrez @gmarcos2003

112 Followers 476 Following

We know who we're, but know not what we may be. Aviation Enthusiast.

Logic Wordworths @logic_mufc

2K Followers 5K Following We know who we're, but know not what we may be. Aviation Enthusiast.

Josephat Mbari Gikon @gikon_mbari

22 Followers 73 Following

Janine Sallows @JanineSallows

10 Followers 85 Following

Retweeter of Tweets, blogger at https://t.co/5psz4MnoZB

osseous matter @ManCaveSM

14K Followers 16K Following Retweeter of Tweets, blogger at https://t.co/5psz4MnoZB

Sheryl @sherylcranch1

44 Followers 741 Following

On a mission to teach the world the joy of soap carving at https://t.co/gnkU8TQKF3

Soap Carving Guru @Soapcarvingguru

473 Followers 3K Following On a mission to teach the world the joy of soap carving at https://t.co/gnkU8TQKF3

Zhou Dingxin @ZDingxin

6 Followers 78 Following

Cassandra Marshell @Cassand31051991

9 Followers 99 Following I'm honest

Meh. I just play whatever at this point. Follow at your own risk.

Killiden @Killiden

146 Followers 86 Following Meh. I just play whatever at this point. Follow at your own risk.

✯ cheeky tweets & musical mischief ✯ be excellent to each other! 🤘🏽#musician #actor #absurdist ✯ https://t.co/j1HmNNL63M

Aristotle Dreher 🪩 @AristotleDreher

32K Followers 7K Following ✯ cheeky tweets & musical mischief ✯ be excellent to each other! 🤘🏽#musician #actor #absurdist ✯ https://t.co/j1HmNNL63M

26 | I'm me. | For the last time, you put them in the toaster. | DMs open | I block ads, bots, spoilers, and bait 🧡

TheToasterWaffle 🧇 @TstrWffl

829 Followers 196 Following 26 | I'm me. | For the last time, you put them in the toaster. | DMs open | I block ads, bots, spoilers, and bait 🧡

puzzles/brainteasers/sudoku/picross/Japan/cats/comedyshows/indiegames/developer
my app : Pixnuri If you like logic puzzles you'll like it.

pixnuri @pixnuri_en

1K Followers 2K Following puzzles/brainteasers/sudoku/picross/Japan/cats/comedyshows/indiegames/developer my app : Pixnuri If you like logic puzzles you'll like it.

I'm hella clutched cause I keep everything around me tight. Now let me cuff you. TURN ON MY NOTIFICATIONS TO REMAIN ACTIVE💕👅

Meelah @hellaclutched

10K Followers 10K Following I'm hella clutched cause I keep everything around me tight. Now let me cuff you. TURN ON MY NOTIFICATIONS TO REMAIN ACTIVE💕👅

Passionate about life & innovation: Founder of #VoxelOcean, Ambassador & Streamer for @TheSandboxGame, Digital Marketer, Web3 Consultant, and Crypto Enthusiast!

Luka.ron 🏞️ @LukusIsRight

14K Followers 688 Following Passionate about life & innovation: Founder of #VoxelOcean, Ambassador & Streamer for @TheSandboxGame, Digital Marketer, Web3 Consultant, and Crypto Enthusiast!

Fashion • Makeup • Turn on post notifications 🔔• https://t.co/eDv3MtfMs4

✨Nailah Khatri ✨ @nailahkhatri

13K Followers 6K Following Fashion • Makeup • Turn on post notifications 🔔• https://t.co/eDv3MtfMs4

leo 👑 @vncetyler

330 Followers 908 Following bicha sandy

Headbanger for all metal, Gamer.

dirtypixie @1dirtypixie

916 Followers 5K Following Headbanger for all metal, Gamer.

Vale Ríe @seriuslyValerie

50 Followers 407 Following Not a Muggle.

Jhade Haplasca @FafaJadeMoBes

6 Followers 25 Following Jade 2.0 😎😉🙊

Preduk1973 @Preduk1973

6 Followers 46 Following

omg i love hairy potter so much he makes my heart melt !!!!!!!!!i can eat chocolate frogs all day!!!!!! 😍😍😍😍😍I luv starbuckz n my boyfriend is hairy stylez

Queen of Starbucks @HPlover5evaaa

5 Followers 152 Following omg i love hairy potter so much he makes my heart melt !!!!!!!!!i can eat chocolate frogs all day!!!!!! 😍😍😍😍😍I luv starbuckz n my boyfriend is hairy stylez

I CHOOSE YOU @THATONESILLY 😏

pRiNcEsS 🍑 @itshaystar

51 Followers 214 Following I CHOOSE YOU @THATONESILLY 😏

Once a Soldier, Always a Soldier.
British Army Veteran.
Animal lover.
Football, LFC.
Speedway, ACES.
Serial moaner 👍🍻✊✊💦💦

Danny Tromans @DannyT2512

11 Followers 102 Following Once a Soldier, Always a Soldier. British Army Veteran. Animal lover. Football, LFC. Speedway, ACES. Serial moaner 👍🍻✊✊💦💦

Member Engagement Director, Event Planning, #Hashtag game playa, wife, mom of 3 sons, creative, passionate, love to make people laugh!

geniune heart❤️�... @tindellfive

645 Followers 3K Following Member Engagement Director, Event Planning, #Hashtag game playa, wife, mom of 3 sons, creative, passionate, love to make people laugh!

Spam account tbh.

Alexis @Makeuphoneyy

218 Followers 884 Following Spam account tbh.

Jeffery @jefferylottfrog

247 Followers 2K Following

Hi I'm 16, in my 6th year at Grange Academy, and I live in Scotland.

Rachel Mccluskie @RMccluskie

65 Followers 198 Following Hi I'm 16, in my 6th year at Grange Academy, and I live in Scotland.

Maybe I'm real, maybe I'm not.

Kira @KiraSavage_2463

15 Followers 176 Following Maybe I'm real, maybe I'm not.

. @emmadunn108

8 Followers 64 Following

Chris @The_Real_Chris2

12 Followers 92 Following

Lauren Wade @LaurenW42462370

7 Followers 40 Following

Guinness World Record Holder-Most Jokes Told in an Hour. Nova's Teacher of the Year (Funniest) Finalist. SA Young Achiever Finalist. Raw Comedy State Finalist

Taylor Goodwin @TaylorGoodwin__

33K Followers 33K Following Guinness World Record Holder-Most Jokes Told in an Hour. Nova's Teacher of the Year (Funniest) Finalist. SA Young Achiever Finalist. Raw Comedy State Finalist

Raelynn Clark @obeeyyraee

15 Followers 67 Following Ræ

alias @zoeysmommy__

5K Followers 6K Following

Michael Beardmore @MikeBeardmore1

6 Followers 55 Following

The most recognizable potato chip salesman in North America.

Marc Casetta @CasettaMarc

172 Followers 590 Following The most recognizable potato chip salesman in North America.

Troy Jerry @BadRadDadJokes

12 Followers 28 Following

joe @BirdDinner

304 Followers 613 Following

Don't trust nobody

Ehtshaam Jay Fazal @ehtshaam_jay

10 Followers 108 Following Don't trust nobody

Saved by the grace of God

Hannah cooper. no dms... @Hanahx36

54K Followers 55K Following Saved by the grace of God

Canadian. Mom. Dog obsessed.

Catt Meow @morrmeow

23 Followers 62 Following Canadian. Mom. Dog obsessed.

Health Advocate for Multiple System Atrophy @MSAAwareness Board Member @MissionMSA https://t.co/pdbU0eCFzs

Pam Bower @pammygb

538 Followers 893 Following Health Advocate for Multiple System Atrophy @MSAAwareness Board Member @MissionMSA https://t.co/pdbU0eCFzs

I’m an entrepreneur with a passion for bringing like-minded people together. Will you join me? Join the Beta at https://t.co/8FH254lkWf

Daniel Goddard @DanielGoddard

296K Followers 114K Following I’m an entrepreneur with a passion for bringing like-minded people together. Will you join me? Join the Beta at https://t.co/8FH254lkWf

Customized #cashlesstipping platform for hotels and hospitality. Increasing tipped employee earnings in a post-COVID world and increasingly cashless society.

TipBrightly @TipBrightly

1K Followers 4K Following Customized #cashlesstipping platform for hotels and hospitality. Increasing tipped employee earnings in a post-COVID world and increasingly cashless society.

lmaaaaaaa @Franckycarter33

6 Followers 18 Following

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