Emily @emily_r_schultz

⚡️ instagram.com/emily.r.schultz Washington, USA Joined October 2010

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65
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Emily @emily_r_schultz

3 years ago

Enter the Women's Day Sweepstakes presented by Tocca! swee.ps/ccaFPt_erCZJoJ

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

4 years ago

Ever since I cut my hair- when I don’t style it right- I look like curly Lord Farquaad. With a touch of berries and cream.

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I realized that, as a painfully average straight woman, the “thanking a stripper profusely and giving her a huge tip but declining a dance” experience is eerily similar to “making best friends in the bar bathroom with another drunk girl.”

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

4 years ago

I stg I will find a scent that “smells like a baby prostitute” if it’s the last thing I do. #MeanGirls #JanisIanWisdom

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Nicole Byer aka peppa pig slut @nicolebyer

4 years ago

This is very nice. Thank you!

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

4 years ago

“I’m an empath…” Was that before or after you bullied people in school and used the words “gay” and “retarded” nonstop as slurs?

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

4 years ago

Rebranding NAMI as the “Mentally Hilarious Guild”

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a 🏹 @myelessar

4 years ago

big props to lord of the rings for having giant spiders, dark lords and nazgûl on fellbeasts and making the scariest scene a man eating a tomato

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Mara Wilson @MaraWilson

4 years ago

Anytime I see someone with a mask and unfogged glasses I bow to them, because I have clearly just met a fucking powerful wizard

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

4 years ago

Moving back to the city was the right choice but man I miss dunking on toddlers every weekend.

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

5 years ago

So I scrolled upon this and all I could think of was how people with bpd struggle with a shifting sense of identity and sometimes a feeling of imposter syndrome

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

6 years ago

Ok but where was this when I was in #DBT

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

6 years ago

RAPINOE! #FIFAWomensWorldCup19

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

6 years ago

yo @CW_Riverdale - less singing and more chad michael murray

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

6 years ago

Fainted in the shower today- that was exciting.

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

7 years ago

Tan is my mom. Bobby is my dad. Jonathan is my roommate. Karamo is my therapist. Antoni is my boyfriend.

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

7 years ago

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

7 years ago

I need to stop listening to @CrimeJunkiePod while walking at night cause holy nightmares

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Emily @emily_r_schultz

8 years ago

Paul Ryan pushing tax exemption for (his) kids (yes, okay, technically good) but proceeds to rant about the salvation of our overpopulated planet being the procreation of MORE children. Go kick rocks, you pandering ferret boy.