corn @funkynfruity
Brooklyn, NY Joined June 2011-
Tweets8K
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Followers358
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Following418
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Likes17K
when you send a grandma w dementia cookies…
double cancer AND will cough when i hit the joint??? ugh :(
i was sitting next to someone who smelled like sunscreen. girl! don’t you no i can’t even get cancer in the winter girl
why does dropping anything on the airplane floor feel like you’ve created a sinkhole
how are pretzels simultaneously too salty and not salty enough?
how do people walk with umbrellas and not throw it around a little
spotify accidentally started playing from my phone on the train luckily it was kendrick so everyone thinks i’m cool
i accidentally called my chef “baby” yesterday. we just looked at each other like 🥴
i’m the let me show you this song girl. shh stop talking to me, listen to the lyrics girl
i really be over using lmao. literally nothing is that funny
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