Grumpy House Elf @grumpyhouseelf

Look, I'm not one of those "be productive in quarantine or perish" losers, but if y'all don't clean your bathrooms down to the GROUT with this time, I'm not coming to your anymore house when this is all over

Get coasters and lie about how put together your life is, we’re all doing it

That random pain you felt for no reason? That was your body punishing you for being a shitty owner.

bless the humans who whisper in bookstores as if they’re libraries

You can’t keep adding water to the soap dispenser forever, eventually it becomes JUST WATER 🤬

The best part of house sitting for rich people are their obscenely huge bathtubs

Take a moment to apologize to your body for your brain’s bullshit.

Hungover? Hydrate. Anxious? Hydrate. Want to advance satan’s agenda here on earth? Hydrate.

Hi. Secret Panel HERE 👋 mrlovenstein.com/comic/1058

I like to clean. But I also like to complain about.

Every time I accidentally place my hand on a sticky counter top, a fairy dies #angryhouseelf

My new house elf avi is absolute grumpy perfection~ Check out @ kiotokosolo on IG 💖😍 she does amazing work!

If I die mysteriously, it was definitely the clearly haunted painting in the house I’m dog sitting in

This is a lot of work for a blanket fort but it’s better than like actually cleaning or preparing for the holidays in any way

Tasty Home @TastyHome

7 years ago

This is a lot of work for a blanket fort but it’s better than like actually cleaning or preparing for the holidays in any way

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Comforting. Secret Panel HERE 💩 mrlovenstein.com/comic/1041

I’m kind of like the tooth fairy except I empty your recycling when you aren’t paying attention #angryhouseelf

If you have a maid or someone who cleans for you, lucky you, but like, YOU STILL NEED TO BE DECENT. We are here to clean the basics, not deal with your budding hoarder tendencies.

Don’t clean your entire house in one go and then not clean again for years. Just, pick little things to do everyday, even the tiniest thing. I swear before you know it you’ll feel like a real, actual adult.

You don’t have to be perfect. Let the laundry basket overflow, never own a mop, encourage the cobwebs. But for fucks sake, learn to write a shopping list and follow it. #angryhouseelf

Me, repeatedly slamming the washer door as your clothes mildew

zach @extrafabulous

8 years ago

Me, repeatedly slamming the washer door as your clothes mildew

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