kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

very normal. Joined May 2009

Tweets

2K
Followers

478
Following

90
Likes

2K

kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

8 years ago

Sunday = football & not wearing pants

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

8 years ago

All I wanted was some tacos

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Carrot Facts @RealCarrotFacts

9 years ago

Carots are like bomerangs except they don't come back when you throw them alone in the park today for 3 hours by myself

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

9 years ago

The only holiday picture that ever mattered

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

Very ok with the fact that I follow more Corgi puppy Instagram accounts than human accounts.

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

45 year old gay man tried to make out with me tonight. V confused.

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

My alarm goes off in 28 minutes & I haven't slept yet

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Wiz Khalifa @wizkhalifa

10 years ago

Everytime I get comfortable, I gotta go.

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Baltimore Ravens @Ravens

10 years ago

It's finally here. GAMEDAY! 😈

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

Can it be hooker boot season yet? My body is ready.

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

~Too dumb for Harry Potter~

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

Happy birthday to my honorary Baltimore brudder @pheelipberg

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

I have really really awesome friends.

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

Today was good.

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

"Everybody take a power nap and meet at the hotel bar" *wakes up 6 hours later*

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

10 years ago

I've been thinking about chocolate for about 14 hours

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

11 years ago

Some man came out of the lavatory and said "man I love those" and I was like "what do you love?" And he said "bathrooms" and walked away.

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

11 years ago

@CivilCityMiles hahahahh!!! I miss youuuu

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kelsey schwartz @kelsiumm

11 years ago

Mornings spent in Key West

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Poppa Flock @DJ_BMORE

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