Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

Trying to make folks laugh...at least one person.... A Contributor on the podcast 'Sitting Down with Stand-ups'. I am also a bit of a secret agent..(shhh) sittingdownwithstandups.libsyn.com Joined May 2014

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

3 years ago

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

3 years ago

For some reason, every time I smoke weed on my way home from work and enter my apartment, it always feels like I'm breaking into someone else's home. Then I spend a minute trying to convince myself that I most likely would not do that, but I can't seem to remember the past 5 mins

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

3 years ago

Some guy in North Carolina told me he really needed shoes to get a job and started sizing up my feet... that is one of the only times I have been really glad I was wearing Mary Jane's.

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

4 years ago

I must be losing it... I'm actually considering getting a TikTok account. I'm so used to being the one who's never been on it, I can't imagine the adjustment will be easy.

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

4 years ago

I was a quarter short a dry cycle and I swear I almost had a heart attack! -unfortunatly not a metaphor-

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

4 years ago

Single folks, always remember: you are always one person away from a potential stalker. Shit... guess that goes for everyone 😔. I've been having a rough few months and feel like I should at least need to be rich AND/OR famous for extortion...sigh I'll be back after this brief...

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

4 years ago

Darn it, I guess grieving takes a bit longer than 2 days. I hate feeling lost. 😞 Like all things, this to will eventually be sorted out and locked in my closet of things to cry about only during sappy movies that people claim are 'not' dramas. Let the healing phases pass.

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

5 years ago

A cute, young UPS guy just walked into my office and confidently asked if I had something for him. I immediately thought it was a set up! He just stood in a sexy pose against the door frame for a sec.

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

5 years ago

Sometimes in life, you must kiss ass to save face

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

5 years ago

This is fantastic!

Ryan Reynolds @VancityReynolds

5 years ago

This is fantastic!

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

5 years ago

Tennis & golfer's elbow is getting in the way of my pop n' loc dance dreams 😡. Stupid connective tissue disintegration always gets in the way! #marfansyndrome

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

5 years ago

I noticed today that I can't smell folks through my mask. Now, I'm wondering if others realize this and who has already stopped using deodorant.

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

6 years ago

My mom has been watching a LOT of Bollywood recently...should I be worried??

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

6 years ago

I feel like parents may use this virus later with something like 'you need to get a REAL job, maybe one that can survive a national shutdown'

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

6 years ago

Dating site idea: Do you have the Corona Virus, but no-one to share it with? Coron-a-date? Caution: drunk stoner ideas at play

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

6 years ago

I will be so pissed If I finally got my credit rating above 660 and find it was all for nothing, because of a virus.

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

6 years ago

I woke up this morning with a few numbers written on my hand. Hopefully they were not of some great importance...I washed most of it off before analysing.

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Melanie Gresham @mel_gresham

6 years ago

Just because I mispronounced a word, it doesn't mean it needs to become a 'teachable moment'. I'm talking to YOU, the 16yr old looking kid at The Vitamin Shoppe!