The New York End Times @nyendtimes
Parody is the sincerest form of flattery New York City Joined March 2023-
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The WHO Declares An End To International Public Health Experts agree Earth's inhabitants need to get back to living, also dying.
I'm Not "Sick With Covid" – I'm Biohacking My Immune System
Americans Are Dying "With" Not "From" Pink Eye
Masks Work But You Should Still Think Twice About Wearing One
It's Not All Bad News – Covid Proven To Reduce The Number of People Living With Regrets
Older Americans Increasingly Unwilling To Leave Their Homes
Laughter Isn't The Best Medicine. It's The Only One You Can Afford.
People Are Still Dying From Covid, Just Not Enough To Be Alarmed About
Hospitals to Immunocompromised People – "You Don't Have To Stay Home, But You Can't Come Here" Physicians, healthcare industry experts recommend you just Google it.
It's Time To Reconsider Everything We've Been Told About Smoking
Anyone Suggesting Climate Change Is Unprecedented Hasn't Read The Bible
Millions of Americans Shocked to Learn Gay, Trans People Also Drink Cheap Beer The news is just the latest in a string of attacks on the already fragile heteronormative community.
The Only Thing That Should Disrupt In-Person Learning Is An Active Shooter
Waste Industry Developing A Number of New & Exciting Ways To Make Us Think They're Recycling Single-use plastic bottles could be coming to a waterway near you soon.
Struggling After A Recent Covid Infection? Maybe You Should've Taken Better Care of Yourself
As Life Expectancy Continues To Fall, Major Banks Stop Issuing 30-Year Mortgages Analysts fear five-year auto loans are becoming increasingly unrealistic given our current trajectory.
Most Americans Haven't Been To A Hospital In Years. Who Are Mask Mandates Protecting?
Biden Signs Executive Order, Announces The End of All "Build Back" Infrastructure Projects Millions of Americans disappointed to learn this is the "Better" he was talking about.
Find Something You Love And Let It Kill You. No, Seriously.
Bucket Listing Isn't Just For Old People Anymore
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@EandPCartoons Recommend .@TheVertlartnic & @nyendtimes for covers, @curaffairs for covers & full articles h/t @NathanJRobinson compatible with @EandPCartoons - thanks for the sobbing laughter, you all. Why I watch @traecrowder on YouTube.
@nyendtimes @sarahwoolard I'm not "Sick with Covid" - I'm sick because of Covid biohacking my immune system. -fixed it.
@Mittellaendisch Für den Humor @nyendtimes
@nyendtimes @Friesein Actual quote buried in the actual news service: “Covid has changed our world and it has changed us,” Tedros said. “If we all go back to how things were before Covid-19, we will have failed to learn our lessons and we will have failed future generations.”
edit: “get back to working”
The WHO Declares An End To International Public Health Experts agree Earth's inhabitants need to get back to living, also dying.
@nyendtimes New definition of living-still breathing, sort of half-living but it's fine because you're still able to spend money, not to mention pay for your new medical problems.
Funny because it’s true @nytimes
People Are Still Dying From Covid, Just Not Enough To Be Alarmed About
@Whitestar2261 @nyendtimes Arcturus, a COVID-19 variant, is known to cause conjunctivitis.
They would say that. 😆
Americans Are Dying "With" Not "From" Pink Eye
😂🤣😂
Americans Are Dying "With" Not "From" Pink Eye
@nyendtimes JUST DISPOSE OF THEM PROPERLY, ITS NOT HARD. DON'T LITTER
@nyendtimes @E_catservant A mask is not for life - treat yourself, change it for a clean one. And try and get the mask over your nose and mouth at the same time.
@nyendtimes "Think twice" like if you haven't been wearing one you should think again about wearing one.
Americans Are Dying "With" Not "From" Pink Eye
@nyendtimes Stumbled across this account today. Scrolled through the headlines. Trying desperately to come up with something funny to reply with, but it’s all too true. #CovidIsNotOver #WearAMask #CleanTheAir #WeNotMe
Struggling After A Recent Covid Infection? Maybe You Should've Taken Better Care of Yourself
Hodně cynická parodie :)))
It's Not All Bad News – Covid Proven To Reduce The Number of People Living With Regrets
I CANT 😂
It's Not All Bad News – Covid Proven To Reduce The Number of People Living With Regrets
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