Tim kehoe @prelim_tim
I am my soul mate up bed Joined March 2016-
Tweets61
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Followers14
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Following17
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Likes17
My family at noon: you get anything to drink? Me: yeah I got coffee. Them: what's in it rum chata, baileys?Expectations are high around here
When you bet $20 on a US army vs U.K. Army arm wrestle and your friend loses to the U.K. guy. Should've bet on U.K. 😩
Doesn't go out pays for uber some how. Anytime @Bitchception
Dominos you don't have to call me when you're here. If you think I'm not checking the tracker hungerly every minute you're wrong.
Matt grant walking drunk down the road paying Pokemon go "zubat I hear you come back I wanna catch you" (it was a bat screeching): 😂😂
I don't think I've gone a day this summer without being burnt so far.
"151 rum pineapple juice, and Malibu, caribou, get them all numb."
Im drunker than my roommate and it's his 21st. #teamplayer
I need 2 phones for all the late night phone calls I get during the weekend.
Me and @M_Pilarski are singing classic songs together so that's my Saturday night.
Your real friends always make a difference in your life. The others could care less about you.
The stress relief feeling after taking a major test is just simply orgasmic.
Shoutout to @prelim_tim for the homemade bootylicous fries
My drink is 50% alcohol and it taste like candy. This is how mistakes are made.
I just canceled my pizza order while drunk. #achievements
I'm always sore or injured the day after getting drunk because I do the dumbest shit.
@Bitchception nice twitter ranting bitchell lol
When your family name originates from ireland
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