Joe @toshjoe1
lost in, england Joined October 2012-
Tweets3K
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Followers185
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Following333
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Likes414
I actually get nervous when I’m at the checkout at aldi/Lidl I feel like if you don’t put the shopping in the bag in 0.2 seconds they want you dead
Don’t tell me shit if it’s a lie
Fuck this grey shitty weather I need 28 degrees and the World Cup back on
Sure sex is great but have you ever been overtaken by an idiot driver in a dangerous way who disappears out of sight and then you pull up next to them at the next set of traffic lights and whisper to yourself "well...you didn't get very far did you, mate?"
Being home from uni makes you realise how lucky you are to live in a house with your best mates, like when you’re bored you can’t just go to your mates room and chat pure shit and laugh for hours😭
Movies coming out 2019: Shrek 5 Toy Story 4 Frozen 2 The Secret Life of Pets 2 Aladdin Dumbo The Lion King Spider-Man La Llorona The Conjuring 3 maybe 2019 can be the year..
Trying to hold laughter in because you're not suppose to be laughing has got to be the best feeling
Struggling to remember what it feels like to not have a hangover
what my food sees from inside the microwave
As if I paid £19.50 for a kebab last night and didn’t even think twice about it 😂😂
how are unicorns fake but giraffes are real like what’s more believable a horse with a horn or a leopard-moose-camel with a 40 foot neck
we lost to people who eat beans on toast....... what the fuck................
As if the washing machine has broke and all my clothes are stuck inside it..
Football is gonna be coming home quicker than my mum at this rate xx
We waited 14 years for the new incredible movie to come out and now we’re 1 week away from finding out what happened after this.
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