Michaela Lassig @unfunnymichaela
Human female. Views are rented. michaelaisfunny.com Seattle, WA Joined November 2011-
Tweets2K
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Followers659
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Following575
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Likes672
What do you get when you cross The Handmaiden with The Hunger Games? The U.S. in 2022.
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It’s wild to see all these photos of the famous and rich from The Capitol at the hunger games I mean Met Gala.
Hot take: @elonmusk is Gen Alpha’s Donald Trump.
I was just thinking about how I wish my therapist was my age so that we could grow old together
Sex is great but have you ever found an in-network therapist who is currently taking on new clients?!
“It’s the damn supply chain shortage” is the new “mercury is in retrograde” excuse
My parents made me play clarinet for so many years that they ruined popsicles for me.
Moving to Seattle and the thing I’m most excited about is that tracks can be easily washed away 7 months of the year lolol
I’m starting a petition on change.org to change ‘bullet points’ into ‘hope dots’.
Revenge body is when your body takes revenge on you cuz you treated it like shit, right?
Name a ‘chick flick’ where the girls don’t betray each other OR one where the girls aren’t United to fight the patriarchy in some form. I’ll go first.............. ........... .
If penises could be used as q-tips there would be a lot more women having orgasms.
I researched for 3 days to find the best ergonomic chair with modern design and good ratings for a little birthday treat yo self moment 💁🏻♀️ #35andbarelyalive
The oscars 2021 = virtue signaling BUT WEIRDLY ALSO Me eating a banana = virtue signaling
Is getting people to trust you just a socially acceptable form of virtue signaling? #Showerthoughts
I’m ready for the next gorilla glue girl type of distraction kthanksbye
I think I’m sexually attracted to melted cheese. Am I in or out of the zeitgeist?
The pandemic isn’t over until I can get wasted at @ChaChaLoungeLA again amirite?
It wouldn’t be America if a white man with easy access to fire arms didn’t commit a racially-motivated mass shooting
Weirxo @Weirxo3767460
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Dorris Goyette @DorrisGoye93002
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trey haider @scaredsundew93
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Emily Ballinger @EvaMedhurs69874
18 Followers 813 Following The team provides free cryptocurrency a nalysis,trading instructions, & you can earn $3,000+ per day. WS:https://t.co/VrDAIc52sA
Brosmurn @BrosmurnP7BIn
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Doudou diop @sene_lassiga
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Toby Kiernan @toby_kiernan
522 Followers 4K Following I'm interested by human creativity and technology. Nature enthusiast, self-motivator, Animal lover & Organic SEO Strategist. Follow ME on @Medium @Newsbreakapp!
Prakash Prakash @Prakash73973835
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Profen @profen
187 Followers 452 Following Portland, OR • Impatient with academy. Spanning time. Outsoaring the shadow of night. Monasticism. CATCHES EP.
Edward Scott @EdwardS14444
41 Followers 368 Following I am a man with big heart and beautiful personality . I also like the morning , when i get to drink my coffee, I like my coffee black! How do you like yours ?
Sunny @sunny12322
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Born Consultants @BornConsultants
496 Followers 5K Following Security Consulting Firm Check http://t.co/ycTWBJ6RtL http://t.co/4CBv6Oxyh1
Anna Dievendorf @AnnaDievendorf
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GuttingtheSacredCow �... @GTSCpodcast
4K Followers 4K Following The best movie review/debate podcast where guests try to destroy some of our beloved, acclaimed, & successful films Hosted by @KevinGootee & @KevinIsrael_NJ
RealityCrafter.eth @realitycrafter
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RE Comedy Productions @romane_event
821 Followers 2K Following Started in '05 RE Comedy productions were featured in Outside Lands, SF Sketchfest, Gulf Coast Fest
Mark DiStefano @Mark_DiStefano
2K Followers 2K Following rep: Universal Attractions Agency @UAAtalent insta/TikTok: @mark_distefano | twin: @jdistef93 screenwriter | he/him #pipelinewriters
hannah jones @hannahjonescool
3K Followers 934 Following she/her. comedian, writer, annoying. Featured in Denverite, Westword, and on Channel 7 News.
Age Inclusion in Medi... @ageinclusion
4K Followers 4K Following We champion age inclusion across all media and entertainment platforms through programs that support craft, career, and growth.
Top 10 Films 🎬 @top10films
30K Followers 17K Following Celebrating film for over 15 years! One of the UK's longest-running movie websites.
Victoria Faulkner @Victori85211844
266 Followers 4K Following 2nd year psychology student, so I’ll get in your head before giving you head.❤ My WhatsApp +1(832)382-6366
Max Collett @MaxCollett4
61 Followers 322 Following Climate and economics @ Oxford Uni // Chinese policy analyst @ China Policy here for a better world
tank @vigoss_tank
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patkat @patkat
147 Followers 728 Following Content creator, comedy promoter, people connector. Irish in another life. #RuthlessResistor
Nick Hoffman Comedia @nick_comedia
45 Followers 110 Following stand up comic, husband, father, teacher, pirate.
Kenneth M Lassig @KLassig
1 Followers 13 Following Father to a wonderful Son, Son to a great Mother, 70 yrs old, look 60, feel 50. Artist at heart, Conservative, Avid Golfer, Loyal Friend and Dog Lover.
Jesse Jones @JessePJones
580 Followers 276 Following Owner of @STABcomedy in Sacramento, CA. Co-Host of the @VanFullofCandy show on @KUTZfm. Also, I've collected a book full of my funnies! CONSUME https://t.co/RaJNolrZdb
SketchDeck @SketchDeck
676 Followers 1K Following Your next-generation creative partner - We're the fastest way to work with your own expert design team. Agency-quality at on-demand speed.
ash chen @ashbitchen
537 Followers 571 Following grandpa | maude writer @ucbtla | former managing editor @The_Belladonnas | words in @pointsincase @littleoldlady__ @thisisrobotbutt
Bob Gurnett - bobgurn... @BobIsntFunny
7K Followers 1K Following Comedian. NBA Free Agent. Moron. For booking: [email protected]
at-bags US @atbags_us
928 Followers 2K Following 🌎💼👔WE stand for tolerance, openness, fairness, respect, adventurousness, the claim to a fulfilled life & enjoyment.🍲🍷☀️
Medsworth @MustBeTheMeds
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Vickie Gordon @VickieGStandup
456 Followers 1K Following Love to Laugh...Love to make people Laugh! Doing Stand-up with a touch of Improv!! @gordonvickie instagram
HSC Next @HSCNext
529 Followers 1K Following Our mission is to serve UNTHSC researchers & the community through the development, promotion & commercialization of technologies arising at @UNTHSC.
ManageXR @ManageXR
101 Followers 3 Following The Standard in VR & AR Enterprise Management. Track, Manage and Deploy apps, files, and settings to all devices with ease.
Seattle Police Depart... @SeattlePD
585K Followers 1K Following Seattle PD news/events. Not Monitored. Call 911 to report emergencies. Privacy Policy: https://t.co/T5EaWoa7EZ * Preliminary Info Subject To Change
Anna Dievendorf @AnnaDievendorf
73 Followers 96 Following 💻 Sr. Marketing Manager at @fanbooster @ByTraject. 👱🏻♀️Marketing, SAAS, SEO, Social, hiking, dogs, paddleboarding, van conversions, Boston sports & caffeine
Garrett Sussman @garrettsussman
5K Followers 834 Following Director of Marketing @iPullRankAgency | SEO and Content Marketing | 🎙 SEO Podcaster (150+ episodes) | 💿 90s nostalgia | 💪 Dad | SEO Week and MozCon Speaker
GuttingtheSacredCow �... @GTSCpodcast
4K Followers 4K Following The best movie review/debate podcast where guests try to destroy some of our beloved, acclaimed, & successful films Hosted by @KevinGootee & @KevinIsrael_NJ
RealityCrafter.eth @realitycrafter
793 Followers 3K Following Building @thenounspace | Founding Member @atxdao | Creating community and good vibes wherever I go.
Vice President Kamala... @VP46Archive
14.6M Followers 6 Following This is an archive of a Biden administration account, maintained by the National Archives and Records Administration.
Douglas Emhoff Archiv... @SecondGent46
1.6M Followers 6 Following This is an archive of a Biden administration account, maintained by the National Archives and Records Administration.
Jill Biden Archived @FLOTUS46Archive
4.2M Followers 5 Following This is an archive of a Biden administration account, maintained by the National Archives and Records Administration.
SUP DOC @supdocpodcast
2K Followers 4K Following Since 2015: The #1 Podcast about Documentaries hosted by comedians @PacoRomane @georgethechen w rad guests! By Doc Fans For Doc Fans. [email protected]
D @fiercefish88
257 Followers 0 Following
Paul F. Tompkins @PFTompkins
1.1M Followers 3K Following TV & standup & improv & podcasts, hardly any movies Instagram: https://t.co/OWAlzVWjle
RE Comedy Productions @romane_event
821 Followers 2K Following Started in '05 RE Comedy productions were featured in Outside Lands, SF Sketchfest, Gulf Coast Fest
Travis Lyles @travislylesnews
7K Followers 2K Following former deputy director, social/founder of the Instagram team @washingtonpost | @forbes 30 Under 30 | 757 | @nabj | @seminoles forever
Tyler Daguerre (they/... @tylerdaguerre
851 Followers 2K Following Barista. Labor Organizer. Juris Doctor. Co-Founder of ION: https://t.co/ZiOvzvzBvh Support @bbiunion: https://t.co/BNKuggXhhE
Mark DiStefano @Mark_DiStefano
2K Followers 2K Following rep: Universal Attractions Agency @UAAtalent insta/TikTok: @mark_distefano | twin: @jdistef93 screenwriter | he/him #pipelinewriters
Pope Leo XIV @Pontifex
18.9M Followers 46 Following Welcome to the official account of His Holiness, Pope Leo XIV.
Pope Francis – ARCH... @Pontifex266Arch
18.2M Followers 71 Following
hannah jones @hannahjonescool
3K Followers 934 Following she/her. comedian, writer, annoying. Featured in Denverite, Westword, and on Channel 7 News.
Age Inclusion in Medi... @ageinclusion
4K Followers 4K Following We champion age inclusion across all media and entertainment platforms through programs that support craft, career, and growth.
Writers Guild of Amer... @WGAWest
89K Followers 2K Following A labor union representing writers of motion pictures, television, radio, and internet programming.
NickWritingProgram @NickWriting
10K Followers 60 Following The Nickelodeon Writing Program is designed to attract, develop, and staff writers with diverse backgrounds and experiences on Nick productions.
Top 10 Films 🎬 @top10films
30K Followers 17K Following Celebrating film for over 15 years! One of the UK's longest-running movie websites.
Max Collett @MaxCollett4
61 Followers 322 Following Climate and economics @ Oxford Uni // Chinese policy analyst @ China Policy here for a better world
Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris
20.8M Followers 702 Following Always fighting for the people. Wife, Momala, Auntie. She/her. 107 Days available for pre-order now.
Laszlo Bock @LaszloBock
28K Followers 1K Following Co-founder @humuinc, @gretel_ai, and @ucberkeley | x-SVP People Ops @google | Author "Work Rules!" | People/science/human rights/comic books
BlockbusterMentality @blockbustercast
13K Followers 10K Following The Podcast where Actors, Filmmakers, Critics & Content Creators dissect their favorite films! @CACF_Critics members.
Hal Rudnick @halrudnick
39K Followers 3K Following Former salesman of Cutco knives. Ask me about it!
Joe Biden @JoeBiden
38.1M Followers 46 Following Husband to @DrBiden, proud father, grandfather, and great grandfather.
Evthokia Hobbs, MD @ehobbse
74 Followers 65 Following Hematology and Oncology Fellow at MD Anderson Cancer Center. All tweets are my own.
Nathaniel Meyersohn @nmeyersohn
15K Followers 7K Following Reporter @CNN. Mostly posts about NYC & Knicks here.
Rooster T. Feathers C... @RoosterTF
3K Followers 175 Following Roosters is the neighborhood comedy club for the entire Bay Area! Live stand up comedy in an intimate setting in the heart of the Silicon Valley!
Kenneth M Lassig @KLassig
1 Followers 13 Following Father to a wonderful Son, Son to a great Mother, 70 yrs old, look 60, feel 50. Artist at heart, Conservative, Avid Golfer, Loyal Friend and Dog Lover.
STAB! Comedy Theater @stabcomedy
390 Followers 246 Following A community of comedians dedicated to producing and uplifting subversive, original & offbeat comedy!
Jesse Jones @JessePJones
580 Followers 276 Following Owner of @STABcomedy in Sacramento, CA. Co-Host of the @VanFullofCandy show on @KUTZfm. Also, I've collected a book full of my funnies! CONSUME https://t.co/RaJNolrZdb
Art Or Not Art @ArtDecider
155K Followers 943 Following Art is not everything but anyone and anything can be art.
Elizabeth Warren @SenWarren
6.6M Followers 495 Following U.S. Senator, Massachusetts. She/her/hers. Official Senate account.
Elizabeth Warren @ewarren
5.5M Followers 545 Following U.S. Senator, former teacher. Wife, mom (Amelia, Alex, Bailey, @CFPB), grandmother, and Okie. She/her. Official campaign account.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cor... @AOC
12.7M Followers 4K Following US Congresswoman, NY-14. In a modern, moral, and wealthy society, no American should be too poor to live. People-Funded, takes no lobbyist💰. Personal account.
ash chen @ashbitchen
537 Followers 571 Following grandpa | maude writer @ucbtla | former managing editor @The_Belladonnas | words in @pointsincase @littleoldlady__ @thisisrobotbutt
amber ruffin @ambermruffin
209K Followers 914 Following Comedian, Writer, and Host of The #AmberRuffinShow on @Peacock!Trends for United States
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