BrainDead Bob @BrainDead__Bob
Self-diagnosed retardation. Intelligence level: Tree Mom’s basement Joined June 2014-
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I’d always thought that a functional alcoholic was someone who could perform well (like study or work) while being utterly wasted.
Memories make us think that the past was better. This is not because we look at the past through rose-tinted glasses but because life actually gets shittier and shittier.
Ho ho ho Merry Christmas 🎄 #2024Xmas
This is literally my favourite teacher back in school:
It’s been a tough week for me since I hurt my left hand last week. For example, it’s really hard to handle my “stuff” with just one hand “wink wink”. Yep, I need both hands to handle my bike and it’s awful that I can’t ride my bike to work now.
What I’ve achieved in twelve weeks (36 hours of lecture) of thermal physics: 1. I’ve learned that the only content I understand is the syllabus. 2. The only answer I confidently wrote down in the mid-term was my name. #ThermalPhysics #Thermodynamics
Friend: don’t worry just act normal (Me on my first date) Her: Oh so what do you like to do? Me: I… I like to do… do Shrek WTF is wrong with me 🤦♂️
Everyone: Dumb people are happier. Me with 69 IQ: No it ain’t true 😢
What is Karen’s favourite position 😉 THE MANAGER!
My advice to anyone who wants to have kids: Just don’t. Imagine spending 20 years to raise a little monster just so that it can turn out to be a self-centred ungrateful twat like me (speaking this on behalf of my parents). #Advice
Soooo excited to receive my DNA test! It turns out I’m 30% chimpanzee, 10% ninja, 5% watermelon, 20% T-Rex, 15% Apache attack helicopter, 25% rubbish bin. I feel so proud to be of such diversity ☺️ #DNA_test
Just wondering, do mosquitos suck other mosquitoes’ blood if the need arises?
Jenny @sytelaez68980
67 Followers 2K Following
High T Memes @high_t_memes
93K Followers 21 Following Memes that boost your testosterone levels | DM for submission | IG: high_t_memes | $TREN
Greentext Reposter @UnitGraph
11K Followers 121 Following I post greentexts and 4chan images to try and make your day better. feel free to DM any suggestions.
The 4Chan Archives @blacknredtext
85K Followers 167 Following Archiving the best of 4chan for twitter to see, not just greentexts either. (DM submissions) posted =/= endorsed Discord: https://t.co/LoXwwf0iqE
WholesomeMemes @WholesomeMeme
2.9M Followers 275 Following 🇨🇦 We post memes, comics, wholesome stuff & anything we like. Get original shirts to raise money for charity https://t.co/Upa2OFOAJk
My Chemical Romance @MCRofficial
1.4M Followers 283 Following @FrankIero, @GerardWay, @MikeyWay, @RayToro
Greentext Poster @GreenTextRepost
579K Followers 275 Following Posting the best 4chan greentexts. (Just cause it’s posted doesn’t mean it’s endorsed) (personal @mrprepost )
Aldi Stores UK @AldiUK
679K Followers 3K Following The official Aldi UK Twitter page. This week our Social Media Team are available Monday to Saturday 8am-8pm and Sunday 10am-4pm.
Black cats are not ba... @visualscat
293K Followers 25 Following Black Cats are not bad luck. They are elegant loving and delightful companions 🐈⬛❤️ / Business inquiries : [email protected] 📨
The Onion @TheOnion
11.2M Followers 7 Following America's Finest News Source. A @globtetrahedron subsidiary. Get the paper delivered to your door: https://t.co/jJP2Apbhe8
cat with confusing au... @Cat__Auras
2.1M Followers 0 Following
cats with jobs 🛠 @CatWorkers
2.1M Followers 313 Following Good cats being workers • Unionized • Merch: https://t.co/eB4eSBdbRP
Everything Out Of Con... @EverythingOOC
1.0M Followers 2K Following EOOC 💀/ DM about credit /🔈 No gimmick just random funny things / Banner by @nubcat / funny stuff & thoughts ✧ oomfy @OctoMommyy @littleteasers @whotfisjovana
out of context dogs @contextdogs
2.0M Followers 915 Following follow us for daily dog Content 🐶| Dm for credit and removals | @gifpuppies
Dudes Posting Their W... @DudespostingWs
2.7M Followers 34 Following Ironically Funny and Wholesome. DMs open for submissions 🥂 DM for Removal or Credit
Cats for Happiness. @JoyfullCat
372K Followers 5 Following Meow moments captured! 📷 🐈Your daily dose of cat videos || Dm for Credit.
cat drawing @catportray
1.4M Followers 163 Following official catportray. Dm for commission. Draw all animals 🤞support - https://t.co/JdbR9zuIH6
Out of Context Human ... @NoContextHumans
4.2M Followers 304 Following The ORIGINAL Out of Context Human Race page! Subscribe to us for $1!↗️ No Copyright intended. @Rainbetcom
star 💫 @stxrinsky
2.0M Followers 55 Following one and only | turn on post notifications for a follow back
internet hall of fame @InternetH0F
4.0M Followers 412 Following the internet just wouldn't be the same without these iconic posts. credit ≠ endorsement
No Context Brits @NoContextBrits
1.8M Followers 0 Following A mordant celebration of British mediocrity according to the Washington Post. Contains sarcasm, irony and context.
Why you should have a... @ShouldHaveCat
4.3M Followers 247 Following The perfect account to show to your parents when you want a cat 😺❤ @FoundationOfWen
World of Engineering @engineers_feed
3.5M Followers 69 Following The most fun way to learn something new everyday. Brother page of @stats_feed YouTube https://t.co/rAUIl0V1xC
Elon Musk @elonmusk
225.3M Followers 1K Following
Richard Hammond @RichardHammond
2.9M Followers 133 Following Recently re-employed car show bloke. Has own bicycle.
Jeremy Clarkson @JeremyClarkson
8.0M Followers 197 Following I am a still small voice of calm and reason.
Top Gear @BBC_TopGear
1.9M Followers 39 Following Proper #TopGear tweets from Top Gear HQ. This is a commercial channel from BBC Studios. Top Gear Turbo Newsletter - https://t.co/FAE1PvkamQTrends for United States
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