sam schultz-walsh 2.0 @FakeSamSchultz
locked out of @realsamschultz lol California, USA Joined February 2022-
Tweets159
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Followers73
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Following142
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Likes166
IM BACK
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
would rather land upside down
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
Im tired tomorrow
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
I remember they banned these in school because it was that serious lmaoo
I remember they banned these in school because it was that serious lmaoo
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
“can you watch someone’s story for me” oh absolutely I never gave a fuck
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
Amazing how threadup carries hundreds of brands and somehow every single thing is this
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
accidentally clicking the grok button makes me feel like I've killed my entire family and bloodline. accidentally clicking the video button makes me feel like I have personally been shot 57 times.
my plants don’t know it’s winter
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
your 20s are for figuring out what's the max number of times you can hit rock bottom in a calendar year
after a month, twitter support finally got back to me about being locked out of @RealSamSchultz. after their investigation, they concluded i still have access to the account but i DO NOT😭😩
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
I accidentally searched for gender neutral garlic bread
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
I asked a guy on hinge what’s the last book he’s read and he said he skimmed through the 2001 Guinness world record
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
That should do it
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
therapist: i think we need to work on your tendency to catastrophize me: oh great so you fucking hate me?
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
chat gpt is not your friend, therapist, confidant, doctor, or anything else. please go outside.
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
replacing “i don’t know” with “unfortunately the answer would drive you to madness” in all work emails going forward
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
20-22 was for disorders. 23-26 was for partying and masochism. i think 27-30 will be for nesting. and then my 30s will be for partying again but good this time
sam schultz-walsh 2.0 retweeted
me at fourteen for some reason
me at fourteen for some reason
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