@(Grievous)@ @GeneralGrevious
~Satire fearless & searching moral inventory. Tweets appearing in FORTUNE magazine Twitter god Joined August 2008-
Tweets48K
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Followers6K
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Following858
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Likes53K
It's my #Twitterversary! I have been on Twitter for 14 years, since 13 Aug 2008 (via @twi_age).
It's my #Twitterversary! I have been on Twitter for 13 years, since 13 Aug 2008 (via @twi_age).
It's my #Twitterversary! I have been on Twitter for 12 years, since 13 Aug 2008 (via @twi_age).
It's my #Twitterversary! I have been on Twitter for 11 years, since 13 Aug 2008 (via @twi_age).
I lost a lot of friends by getting too fucked up at parties and waiting on the toilet for someone to wipe me
If i can't run my whore mouth on Twitter.. I'm out of options
Say "excrement" instead of "excellent". Nobody will notice because people really don't listen for shit.
My statistician friend insists I'm having a median life crisis.
I'm gonna tweet something life changing when I get home from work. Right now I'm eating a lunchable.
being buried alive is the ultimate weighted blanket
Drank so much wine the fruit flies are hovering near my open mouth.
Anyone else ever notice Mario is just a little bit faster than Luigi? Twitter 1983 probably
I joined Twitter to do something good.. to help people
I would need to talk to you in person to be sure.. Twitter is ripe with the Oedipus Complex
The main impediment to even the staunchest of libertarians becoming a proponent of a social welfare system is three missed paycheques.
The 8 bit Ghostbusters theme is pure rock n roll
Humans are beautiful. People are fucked up.

Verifried Drunk™®�... @VerifiedDrunk
27K Followers 2K Following The later the tweet, the drunker I am. it/that/drunk
Nien Nunb @Nien_Nunb
5K Followers 1K Following Sullustan lookin' for love in all the wrong places. niennunb on teh blueskies
RUTH BUZZI @Ruth_A_Buzzi
200K Followers 5K Following Ruth Buzzi was an entertainer who generously brought her gifts of love and laughter to a needy world for more than half a century.
𝗗𝗔𝗥𝗧𝗛 ... @Darth_VaderNo1
34K Followers 36K Following #DarthVader #Sith #StarWars fan since 1977 #TeamDarkSide #FanAccount In the Mountains of 🏴 (NSFW) Here for a laugh..and fun, love #Boobs
💙 Something Wicked... @CamusOverEasy
17K Followers 15K Following I like Albert Camus and eggs over easy. Former cabbie/bartender/band manager/insurance guy. Veteran. The Shit Show has begun. Buckle up. 凡人
Dr Pepper M.D. 🥤 @JustLikeMikee
23K Followers 23K Following All answers questioned here. I’m definitely not a doctor. Partial facts and stuff. I read a book about it.. once.
Electro Dragon 🗿 �... @EDrag_CR420
376 Followers 4K Following 16 IRL | 🇹🇭 | Electro Dragon 🗿 | Go Follow @WhiteLilyLOL172 | NSFW, NFT OWNERS DNI/DNF | #FreePalestine #CeasefireInGaza Block = I Own U
Doomy McDoom Butt @mozsab
3K Followers 2K Following Tony Martin appreciation page/official Paradise Lost dietician
Suriel @VelarisFae13
96 Followers 240 Following lover of makeup, my guy, my dogs, coffee, burlesque, 🌬🍃 💚 ,vintage stuff people think is weird, tattoos, video games.... Poor crafter of ugly creations
DD 🍈 🍈 MELONS @DDDMelons
10K Followers 4K Following
Tracey Dunshea @DunsheaTracey
64 Followers 48 Following star wars fan,supporter of LBGTQIA+ community member of team weird
Padwan Tom @PadwanTom
7 Followers 148 Following Studying Jedi ✨ | Coruscant native 🌆 | Book reader 📚 | #StarWarsRP
Rouxls Kaard Gay @Charlie04345342
1 Followers 23 Following
Awful Clash Of Clans ... @CoCFacts_2
324 Followers 4K Following 15 | @CoCFacts_1’s Alt | NSFW, PROSHIP, PEDOS, ZOOS, NFT OWNERS DNI | I Play Minecraft | PFP Badly Drawn By @belorussiandino | Star Wars Fan | Banner From MSM
RETIRED TW1TTER USER ... @WhiteLilyLOL172
444 Followers 3K Following 16 | 🇹🇭 | RETIRED | YT: @WhiteLilyLOL1726 | BlueSky: https://t.co/lrE5MWBZUK |
MandoTAMC @MandoTamc
14 Followers 165 Following
€¥•mileamore @CunningCashew
365 Followers 4K Following "I don’t know what I’m doing!" 😅✌🏼. Painter 🎨. Pc Gamer 🎮 🕹 ”Something Else”. Turtle Owner🐢. I like cheesecake 🍰 Computer Nerd 💻
Rogier van Buul @Rogier_vanBuul
25 Followers 519 Following
Arcadia - Moved To Bl... @SpaceWeeb_
124 Followers 2K Following Find me here! https://t.co/WrDxqFkGPk
Dante Pierre-paul @DantePierrepa10
18 Followers 389 Following I love everything starwars and starwars lightsabers and computer speakers
CC - 1378 Cmdr Viper @CT1378
240 Followers 592 Following Look around. We're one and Same. Same heart, same blood
Jason @DCLjasonx
7K Followers 6K Following Founder at https://t.co/R1cBYgGy8l AI → ASI Premium Superintelligence Domain Names Marketplace email: [email protected]
Queen Neeyutnee @neeyutnee
12 Followers 32 Following Queen of Naboo. This war is tearing the republic apart.
Mike L. @mjlynn77
282 Followers 2K Following 🏴☠️letsGoBucs!🦜⚾️ how ‘bout them Cowboyyyyzzzz🏈 big fan of Star Wars, Aquaman, 80s toon stuff, Dead 💀🌹⚡️, and ZBryan🎸
Elsie Self @ElsieSelf10
34 Followers 359 Following
Stormblade1342 @mitchbanke1342
17 Followers 95 Following Republican Presidential Task Force Member #Nationalist,#DonaldTrump, #PhonyKamalaHarris,#Conservative,#2ndAmendment
Alejandro Moreno-Vega @TheYoungDro99
190 Followers 836 Following |100% 🇲🇽 | @DairyWorldFC Athlete no 99| My Tweets My Thoughts
Mr.RayFed↙️ @MrRayFed
1K Followers 924 Following I'm a virtual explorer IRL. I've consumed enough coffee to kill lesser human beings. I am the sound of my own ignorance, but I've studied it extensively.
Anakin Skywalker @SkyGuy4Life
15 Followers 70 Following Im the chosen one obv I dont like sand :/ I like all things smooth😎 You underestimate my power 😶
Melani Zuniga @melanizuniga
193 Followers 821 Following Graphic designer. Fan of cats, cosplay, anime and Supernatural. Team Free Will! #OnlyLove
Unga Bunga @vexdly
40 Followers 326 Following 9 / 10 doctors recommend another 5.4 trillion to Israel
ghost @ghost12130688
40 Followers 3K Following
009th District- Deeri... @ChicagoCAPS09
7K Followers 4K Following Back of the Yards, Bridgeport, Brighton Park, Canaryville, Chinatown, McKinley Park, New City. This account is not monitored 24/7 - Dial 9-1-1 for emergencies
Kennytang469🎮 @Kennytang469
159 Followers 2K Following avionics/electrician on airplanes, music lover, video game nerd. Actually just a nerd.
Flagg19 @Flagg191
197 Followers 2K Following
justin mosshart @txstang42
26 Followers 461 Following
Kosso @growling_one
35 Followers 212 Following Likes solitude, more interested in intellectual pursuits than relationships, not revealing, unemotional, rule breaker, familiar with the darkside
DJ Kam Bennett @KameronBennett
1.9M Followers 1.5M Following I play music. for booking events & business only email [email protected] | DM for promo
Green Eyed Doll @green_eyed_doll
14K Followers 16K Following ~Spend some time in the dollhouse with a caffeinated career mom: a big laughin', sexy thinkin', wine drinkin' baseball lovin small town girl in big city shoes~
fuckin cutie pants @brisky_Suicide
4K Followers 2K Following Cock connoisseur of sorts. Money me. https://t.co/RWcRaEhmPD
Timothy Bird @timothybird186
10K Followers 10K Following Musician; heavy metal saxophone! Writing a novel. unsolicited DM's = blocked 🚫
SaltyGirl @saltssaltgirl
15K Followers 5K Following Dream weaver, Ink Drinker, and Oxford comma user. Thalassophile. Help my classroom https://t.co/N9jVi4K0MZ 🌊
Verifried Drunk™®�... @VerifiedDrunk
27K Followers 2K Following The later the tweet, the drunker I am. it/that/drunk
Nien Nunb @Nien_Nunb
5K Followers 1K Following Sullustan lookin' for love in all the wrong places. niennunb on teh blueskies
Henry 3000 @Henry_3000
30K Followers 12K Following Black Flag-White Pill @jaccarly is never far away.
𝗗𝗔𝗥𝗧𝗛 ... @Darth_VaderNo1
34K Followers 36K Following #DarthVader #Sith #StarWars fan since 1977 #TeamDarkSide #FanAccount In the Mountains of 🏴 (NSFW) Here for a laugh..and fun, love #Boobs
💙 Something Wicked... @CamusOverEasy
17K Followers 15K Following I like Albert Camus and eggs over easy. Former cabbie/bartender/band manager/insurance guy. Veteran. The Shit Show has begun. Buckle up. 凡人
Dr Pepper M.D. 🥤 @JustLikeMikee
23K Followers 23K Following All answers questioned here. I’m definitely not a doctor. Partial facts and stuff. I read a book about it.. once.
Krispy Memes Boi @memes_krispy
8K Followers 4K Following The hottest memes on the block 2nd account: @KrispyMemesBoi
fuckin cutie pants @brisky_Suicide
4K Followers 2K Following Cock connoisseur of sorts. Money me. https://t.co/RWcRaEhmPD
A D H @mouthyhamster
1K Followers 1K Following
Timothy Bird @timothybird186
10K Followers 10K Following Musician; heavy metal saxophone! Writing a novel. unsolicited DM's = blocked 🚫
SaltyGirl @saltssaltgirl
15K Followers 5K Following Dream weaver, Ink Drinker, and Oxford comma user. Thalassophile. Help my classroom https://t.co/N9jVi4K0MZ 🌊
Ryan Fournier @RyanAFournier
1.3M Followers 274K Following National Chairman, Students for Trump - CMO, @UncensoredDotAI - Senior Advisor to some important people
Dr Doolittle @DazGoneBy
2K Followers 2K Following it is double pleasure to deceive the deceiver. Niccolo Machiavelli.
@[email protected]... @JonBaker
13K Followers 10K Following Gamer, geek, Mensan, and lover of all things comedy. Creator of the webcomic Alarmingly Bad (@AlarminglyBad)
King of the North @ANorvege
2K Followers 5K Following ✝️,🇺🇸🗽Patriot/Rider 🏍, JD ⚖️ Protector, Provider, LEO, 2A, MAGA! We bow to no one but God!Locked/loaded, Musician🎸. Hard work = Good life. #VOTEDEMSOUT!
Best Daily Discounts @bestdailydisc
110K Followers 1 Following Tweets contain Amazon Affiliate links! Amazon affiliate Partner! For business enquiries, please contact us via email [email protected]
♡ 𝕁 ᑕнE𝕃... @MedicatedMama3
2K Followers 2K Following Recommended by 4 out of 5 people that recommend things. Spreading smiles like they’re herpes. I have friends in spite of myself.
Seraiah Chatfield @SeraiahChatfie1
273 Followers 957 Following Married Boy dad Step father to an amazing girl I’m political but not here for politics just want to have fun and some https://t.co/5rm2tDq0ka DM’s for porn!!!!
Brian, (with an i) th... @Brian_P4Real
19K Followers 18K Following Send Lawyers, Guns & Money, the shit has hit the fan. |father of 3 & ❤️ my wife | sarcasm from the Dad side of life. Unverified AF💥
sophie loves wine @SandyCastle9
16K Followers 16K Following austin tx. love sports n' wine. cheers ya'll. cowboy nation. #blacklivesmatter #cowboys #wine #weed #football #whiskey
Miss Conduct @serenehavoc
12K Followers 1K Following Rules are for people who don't know what to do. #Chicago
Valentin Grimoux @vaval53
59K Followers 57K Following Official Twitter Valentin GRIMOUX 🇫🇷Ex rider in world championship @WorldSBK 5️⃣3️⃣ Yamaha rider
Tim Coronel @TimCoronel
945K Followers 116K Following #Dakar2025 #Dakarinsaudi #DakarRally 19th time 🐫🐪🐫🐪🐫 #rally CoronelDakar is a marketing team that happens 2 race Fun is our motto
WorkAtHomeADHDMom💙 @OrianaMay
3K Followers 3K Following Taser Face | 2 Boys | Taken | NO DM'S | Psychology Student | ?? 🎂 Active👟 Rock🤘 Gamer 🎲 HORROR 🎈 Social Anxiety | CA | Personal Blog | (future site)
Blind MellowJelly @BMellowjelly
1K Followers 652 Following
CompuVision @CompuVisionBiz
10K Followers 5K Following CompuVision - A VC3 Company is an IT management company that leverages technological innovations for small, medium and large businesses, now and in the future.
Kathleen @sweatsntopknots
111K Followers 26K Following ♋️🌞 ♓️🌙 ♎️ Rising - Just a girl trying to spread smiles one person at a time. #avfc 💜💙 #ferrarif1 🇮🇹❤️💛 — Hey You: https://t.co/GITHaoyw7W
Dysfunction Jct @mjs03093641
14K Followers 8K Following I don’t fucking know! 🥃👩👧👦🏃🏼♀️🌴🐕🌞♥️📚🌛🎶 https://t.co/XCV6rIDfaw
Vinyl Witch 🧙🏻 @Aflgirl126
19K Followers 10K Following The witch is back ! No Dick pics or I’ll share and mock with my friends. Busy introverting. sipping bourbon & love my Phillies ❤️⚾️🇺🇸
Ambien @AminamAmbien
5K Followers 5K Following Words, Sarcastic Words, Swear Words, but mostly just Words... Word.
Scarlett Taylor @scarlettsmuse
37K Followers 31K Following Recording artist. Songwriter. Dark alternative pop.
KristinaNadia @KristinaNadia
3K Followers 2K Following mother, daughter, cat wrangler, book lover, kind of an asshole but mostly lovely.
Canadian Tiger @AddictedToNaps
15K Followers 9K Following
Aaron @AP21984
8K Followers 9K Following I can't tell if my tweets are cheesy or corny but either way I'm getting hungry SC: AP21984
Shit My Kid Does @ShitMyKidDoes1
317 Followers 891 Following Professional Photographer 📸 Coffee addict ☕️ Married 💍 Meme queen 👸🏼 OCD mom 🙃 Sharing the hilarious things my toddler does and says 👧🏼🇨🇦
Lady Car(r)otene @ladycarrotene
7K Followers 4K Following I have great disdain for the Oxford comma and great love for carrots. https://t.co/PskvezO07x
Dreamer @ElgatoEsmio
21K Followers 15K Following I don’t swirl wine because I’m sophisticated I do it because I can barely stand. IG @elgatoesmio
GDP @10_GDP
623 Followers 1K Following 20% Sioux...Actually Cherokee. But the Sioux were cooler. https://t.co/9wGHrU9LJK...
Chincha @chincha33
13K Followers 4K Following I think I've finally gotten rid of my need for another *if I had a hammer* tweet (This is all lies!)
Forward March @RunOldMan
37K Followers 15K Following Disabled Army Veteran, Bills Mafia, Mental Health Matters, Laughter is the best medicine 🇺🇸🇵🇷 Boricua NO MAGA https://t.co/LpPIFl6lcu…
Sarge The Destroyer �... @BastardProphet
30K Followers 19K Following Saudi Arabia and Russia will ree be doo, ahhhhh. - Donald John Trump
Lori K @LifeAsLori
18K Followers 16K Following Author, Illustrator, Designer, Avid Tea Drinker & Animal Lover with BSc(Hons) Animal Science Degree! @Made_By_Lori for my Luxury Boutique!💜x #Orchids #Cats
HiBuddy @HibuddyOrganics
2K Followers 2K Following Organic Cultivated Cannabis. Less Lab, More Farm! AZ Licensed MMJ ⛔ Nothing for sale 🌱 No Pesticides or Chemicals 🔞 18+ only
Ysul Eropagnis @akiraofthesun
5K Followers 5K Following