Probably Injured @PeterClayton6
Based on a true story. Surrey. Joined November 2011-
Tweets14K
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Followers2K
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Following2K
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Likes4K
Me: Here’s half my income. Daycare: Cool. Here’s a new virus every other week.
Just walked past a man who was helplessly staring at his wailing infant in a stroller on this beautiful afternoon in Brooklyn, and then said to the baby: "This feels like an overreaction."
Must be a very worrying time for anyone who has dumped a body in a reservoir.
Bro if it wasn’t for colonization I’d be living with all my siblings and cousins just raising our kids, eating nutritious foods, and living good lives. But no we have to work, dismantle racist systemic structures, and go to the gym
Was just petting my boyfriend’s dog and he said “I’m so glad you like her” and I was like “of course how could I not like her, she’s so cute” and my boyfriend was like “no I’m talking to my dog, it would be really awkward if my dog didn’t like you.”
Wanksy.
Three stages of career development are: I want to be in the meeting, I want to run the meeting, I want to avoid meetings.
me: i’m just gonna switch the big light on for 1 minu- british gas:
Amazing skill. This 777X pilot fights for control after an American tourist walks to the back of the aircraft, then sits down on the left.
I have to say, this is the best picture of a cat blending into a hairstyle and forehead I've seen for some time.
Overheard at the airport in Lanzarote…. Security guard to English man: Sir, could you please put a mask on. English man: we don’t wear those in England any more. Security guard: sir, you arrived on a plane. Do you know you are not in England now?
8 years ago, a wrong number texted me and we just played along. We met up to grab a drink and fell in love. After dating for 2 years, we moved in together. One day, I came home to a beautiful bouquet of flowers and him on the bed fucking my Pilates instructor. This isn't us.
she’s giving birth to inspector gadget
she’s giving birth to inspector gadget
For anyone asking me "Maybe you should give up Crimea and Donbas in exchange for peace?" Before asking this question, name me the specific region in your country you would be willing to give up if Putin started bombing your cities.
Less than zero interest in what anyone outside of Ukraine would "accept" in a peace negotiation. If the people of Ukraine accepted it, it should be acceptable to you. If they didn't, it shouldn't.
I love the Russian people. That is why I have to tell you the truth. Please watch and share.
Stansaid Airport @StansaidAirport
52K Followers 6K Following 00 Days 00 Hours 00 Mins & 52 Seconds since last near miss. Parody.
David Stokes @scottywrotem
7K Followers 1K Following Still no contact from Mastermind, maybe I need to change my specialist subject from 'Dogging sites of the West Midlands'.
Cat From Nowhere @kv8
17K Followers 10K Following omnipresent in absentia, perchance frittering my time away on twitter. ok fine, X. .•| sui juris |•.
JillBetty @wiZii5xEqA936
0 Followers 365 Following
Paola Gans @GansPaol
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Serena Santis @serena_san27268
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Holly Pumarejo @ho_pumare
57 Followers 5K Following
Annie Kastein @AnnieKaste35504
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Adrienne Wolfertz @WolferAdrien
71 Followers 5K Following
Jim P @KimCasey1971
796 Followers 3K Following 50(!) KHFC, Liverpool, Albion Rovers; Labour Party, ACTS Union, Methodist, Anti-Monarchy, fan of PSB and a certain LH! Views personal. (He/him).
💫Mimi Snortlepants.. @mfo28352871
18 Followers 85 Following Tends to laugh at the inappropriate. That includes you.
Bela @bela_nameless
227 Followers 903 Following My place to follow people I appreciate and make my opinions about different things public. In German and English. 20
Alina @Alina7467418726
20 Followers 2K Following
Evelynn Branstetter @EvelyBranstet
72 Followers 5K Following
Halle Mcghie @HalleMcghi97148
46 Followers 5K Following
Kaley Cuoco 💎 @AddiictCuoco
410 Followers 3K Following Fan of sexy and beauty Kaley Cuoco. #KaleyCuoco #TheBigBangTheory #TheFlightAttendant #MeetCuteMovie
Leoninus @7thPrinceLeo
0 Followers 8 Following loves kuroshitsuji, homestuck, yaoi, secondlife, and laughing Plays Unturned, secondlife, mincraft, Terraria
monkey with oxygen ta.. @hehehe_he__hehe
17 Followers 27 Following
Dan Austin @DannyBoy_Austin
180 Followers 196 Following ⚒️Always⚡️Part time amateur stuntman, full time creative menace, Harry Potter fan, crisps addict and West Ham Utd fan
Arthur Njagi @muriithi_kyondo
40 Followers 200 Following Pan African, Farmer, Astrologist, Philosopher, Global warming crusader, Equality ambassador, Mentor.
Gene Barnett @ttenrabg
246 Followers 743 Following
JeJe Donley @Jejedonley1234
51 Followers 437 Following
Teachn @Teachn57443978
104 Followers 5K Following 💖💚 I'm Tеаchn!🤣 Herе is my аlbum аnd mу nude pics!)) Vote fоr mе, baby:💓 https://t.co/8qzBIBnyyy
Marginally Wicked @PinkyD124
30K Followers 15K Following You can't kill me, I'm already dead. #abortionishealthcare #fucktrump
🥇TITAN INJURY LAWY.. @TITANLAWFIRM
126 Followers 2K Following Our job is to get you PAID • (888)TITAN-LAW
Dondellawho @Dondellawho
2K Followers 2K Following Always overdressed countryside dwelling chap, life contributor, grounded explorer, Dalmatian feeder, knowledge harvester and random whimsy aficionado.
G5EGG @g5_egg
7 Followers 50 Following Director of insurance firm passionate about education and business mobile device user customers and stakeholder satisfaction
Rachel 🐟❤️🇺.. @rach0907
8K Followers 4K Following May contain swears. @[email protected] See you there! If you can't be kind, please be quiet. She/her. ADHD.
Jose Quemar @JoseQuemar
20 Followers 174 Following Musician, critic, reader; like sports, wit and nice people. Don't waste time worrying about what you can't change. Stop, I mean it - Anyone want a peanut?
Funny Tweeter @thefunnytweeter
12K Followers 4K Following If we retweet you, that means your tweet was published in http://t.co/PGa2xGXP. To submit a tweet, use http://t.co/dgSEBxyE
Paul Waterson @PaulWaterson
171 Followers 876 Following
orenthal j. @osalupjr
58 Followers 286 Following
Nunya @Nunya64121048
1 Followers 8 Following Undergrad diesel mechanic looking for love in all the wrong places.
Andy 🐀 @andygraaay
506 Followers 853 Following Airline employee and Pokemon player. I prefer the CRJ. All views and opinions expressed are my own. he/him 40/500 #RatVerified
eeeeee @evieedmed
79 Followers 98 Following
Hybrida @Hybrida8
54 Followers 668 Following As an engineer I have the power to both create and destroy
Emily Jamal @EmilyJamal
8 Followers 28 Following
Rob C @robthechopper
197 Followers 639 Following
Jacob Goold @GooldJacob
4 Followers 5 Following
Irene McDonald @IpMcdonald
6K Followers 4K Following My books haven’t sold so I’m painting now, hanging out with thespian types and drinking cheap wine in French cafes #art #painting #middlegrade #writing
lurchermad neil harri.. @neilharris436
2K Followers 5K Following lurchers are my life you like em,I like you.
Georgi Stavrev @gstavrev1
60K Followers 64K Following
Stansaid Airport @StansaidAirport
52K Followers 6K Following 00 Days 00 Hours 00 Mins & 52 Seconds since last near miss. Parody.
Moose Allain Ꙭ @MooseAllain
139K Followers 3K Following He/him. Illustrator, cartoonist, husband, father, son, brother, uncle, nephew, cousin, second cousin, grandson, friend, acquaintance, enemy. @[email protected]
Halo 🌱Ⓥ @EatMyHalo
7K Followers 2K Following Popped a rad lude and woke up here. she/her. #VeganForTheAnimals 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️ same name on Bluesky and Threads
David Stokes @scottywrotem
7K Followers 1K Following Still no contact from Mastermind, maybe I need to change my specialist subject from 'Dogging sites of the West Midlands'.
Cat From Nowhere @kv8
17K Followers 10K Following omnipresent in absentia, perchance frittering my time away on twitter. ok fine, X. .•| sui juris |•.
PerfumeAdsForSale @PerfumeAds
29K Followers 2 Following We write high quality perfume and aftershave adverts, all of which are for sale: £5000 each. Guaranteed hits. Enquiries: [email protected]
Lori Fini @LFiniOH
776 Followers 3K Following (She/Her) Love my girls, pets, knowledge & hot, sweaty yoga. Hate ignorance & hypocrisy. IT Consultant by day, parks & squats every chance I get #MBA #PMP #INFJ
Marginally Wicked @PinkyD124
30K Followers 15K Following You can't kill me, I'm already dead. #abortionishealthcare #fucktrump
cats with powerful au.. @catshouldnt
1.6M Followers 138 Following These cats with powerful auras will brighten up your day ☺️. DM for credit/removal
Rachel 🐟❤️🇺.. @rach0907
8K Followers 4K Following May contain swears. @[email protected] See you there! If you can't be kind, please be quiet. She/her. ADHD.
Funny Tweeter @thefunnytweeter
12K Followers 4K Following If we retweet you, that means your tweet was published in http://t.co/PGa2xGXP. To submit a tweet, use http://t.co/dgSEBxyE
Burn @WKentishTown
366 Followers 280 Following Narrowly failed in my attempt to save the Cosmo before it was lost to the nation, & never got over it.
Nunya @Nunya64121048
1 Followers 8 Following Undergrad diesel mechanic looking for love in all the wrong places.
jo @whatsJo
48K Followers 972 Following b-side. I eat popsicles for breakfast. Trial ft error. 🤖rights. crusha bit, lil bit✨
Andy 🐀 @andygraaay
506 Followers 853 Following Airline employee and Pokemon player. I prefer the CRJ. All views and opinions expressed are my own. he/him 40/500 #RatVerified
eeeeee @evieedmed
79 Followers 98 Following
Emily Jamal @EmilyJamal
8 Followers 28 Following
Rob C @robthechopper
197 Followers 639 Following
mommaunfiltered @MommaUnfiltered
17K Followers 770 Following as the mother of a 25, 15, & 12YO I’m uniquely qualified to say kids suck at any age
Jacob Goold @GooldJacob
4 Followers 5 Following
Irene McDonald @IpMcdonald
6K Followers 4K Following My books haven’t sold so I’m painting now, hanging out with thespian types and drinking cheap wine in French cafes #art #painting #middlegrade #writing
lurchermad neil harri.. @neilharris436
2K Followers 5K Following lurchers are my life you like em,I like you.
Georgi Stavrev @gstavrev1
60K Followers 64K Following
Daniel Gutierrez @dgutierrez84
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Tim Coronel @TimCoronel
974K Followers 128K Following #Dakar2024 #DakarRally 17th time🐫🐪🐫🐪🐫#ExpeditieRobinson 2019 🏝 #jachtseizoen CoronelDakar a marketing team that happens 2 race fun is our motto
Eran Singh @EranSingh2
3 Followers 72 Following
Little Eric @thelittlesteric
5K Followers 643 Following Small boy, big heart. 1/2 of Simon & Garfunkel.
schmox @IvoryGazelle
14K Followers 547 Following Two lib arts degrees and a diabetic cat https://t.co/LLhnBtQDij…
Dipanjana @dipanjana_
99 Followers 149 Following
•°•☆🔥☆•.. @cagedwanderlust
2K Followers 2K Following
James Fridman @fjamie013
2.3M Followers 1 Following Do not submit any personal photos that you do not want to be made public. Terms and conditions apply. https://t.co/WWtgLUfRED
Catherine - @i_ourpatio
2K Followers 5K Following Scot in the USA. Everyone here has a funny accent.❤️ hubby. 3 cats 1 dog. Love art and good comedy. Conservative. Bio pic is me seeing VK home . Deal with it😏
Dave Exotic @thegoldenvis1on
118 Followers 1K Following
@StansaidAirport @LydiaMizon @PeterClayton6 Aaah, good stuff! It's not stealing if it's your own brain!
@eilatg Can't not think of this... x.com/peterclayton6/…
Imagine the effort it took this dolphin to propose, then the woman he loves does this in front of him? Just awful.
@PeterClayton6 @69summer420 Bold of you to assume he was proposing to the woman.
@spil030 x.com/peterclayton6/…
Imagine the effort it took this dolphin to propose, then the woman he loves does this in front of him? Just awful.
What a beauty. Fresh from our engine maintenance facility. Didn't have a few parts, but we made do and you'd never know.
The 17:10 easyJet to Palma has been cancelled due to the pilot being afraid of the dark.
Quite something !
The first aircraft equipped with the new Dyson jet engine. Amazing.
The first aircraft equipped with the new Dyson jet engine. Amazing.
Thrilling chase underway
So sweet. A handler taking his 737 for a morning walk. Who's a GOOD little Boeing?
Slight delay on our supersonic service to New York. The planes haven’t been built yet.
@murrman5 @PeterClayton6 They better get this song and dance right at my funeral There had 3 attempts to do it already... Damn it! They should have gotten it right by now!
Every raccoon is either planning a heist or in the middle of a heist.
Please, my thoughts...they're too heavy
Best birthday ever!! Champagne from @kimbendall, countryside ramble with @bexiita, spinach & artichoke dip from @slummyUSmummy - might literally die from happiness ❤
@gobloid3 @PeterClayton6 your the 8th person i seen that put this same tweet
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