#FactTime @TreeReservation

Having a seat on a public transport whilst others are forced to stand around you is good practice for when you get into heaven and many strangers/friends/colleagues don't

0 0 0 116 0

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

Don't feel bad when you have a seat whislt others stand around you. If they really needed a seat they would be visibly in pain. They would be crying, they would be sweating. They're just lazy.

0 0 0 84 0

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

Depending on the vibe of an overcrowded train and your charisma/kg stats, you'd be surprised how much success you can have asking to sit on people's laps

0 0 0 56 0

Stuck standing on a full train? Want to sit down? Just ask people. "Please may I sit there? I would really like to sit down". There's about one thousand seats on a train, one person will say yes (and usually in the first 10-15 people you try)

0 0 0 43 0

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

Here

0 0 0 41 0

Download Image

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

I look both ways when I cross one-way roads, I like the adrenaline from looking away from oncoming traffic and the self-image of being too cynical to trust drivers to be going the right way even though they always are

0 0 0 32 0

Alex O'Connor @CosmicSkeptic

2 years ago

Peter Hitchens just stormed out of our podcast recording, but not before telling me: “I don’t like you … I really don’t like you. I really have decided in the past hour I really do not like you at all. I had no opinions of you before, and now I actively dislike you.” This…

Peter Hitchens @ClarkeMicah

2 years ago

455 33 675 585K 60

452 103 2K 503K 129

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

I try and stay incredibly abusive towards chatgpt so I'll have better credentials in the human resistance army

0 0 1 30 0

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

My cocaine addiction is really starting to get in the way of my alcohol addiction

0 0 0 36 0

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

If I were a professional hockey player I would use the stick to win the hockey games

0 0 1 29 0

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

Philip 'yin' Schofield and Alison 'yang' Hammond balanced each other out exactly, making This Morning perfectly karmatically neutral

0 0 0 30 0

#FactTime @TreeReservation

2 years ago

Pregnancy scare, time to stop taking the condom off my chorizo

0 0 0 244 0

ShitpostGateway @ShitpostGate

2 years ago

2K 61K 359K 15.6M 3K

Download Image

Perfume Genius @perfumegenius

2 years ago

I’m not gay

28 26 1K 54K 6

Download Image

Terri Joe @TerriJoetheHoly

2 years ago

Why is it so gay outside rn 🙄

38 194 1K 142K 25

Gravantus @Gravantus

2 years ago

Anytime someone posts about not having an internal monologue, I choose to believe they're just stupid and don't understand and think it means literally hearing a voice as if you had earbuds in. I refuse to believe there are people who don't have thoughts. How are you sentient?