Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

consumer and creator of stories Vermont, USA Joined March 2009

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

4 years ago

If someone wanted to get me a massaging, heated neck pillow for Christmas I might be able to save money on therapy. (Jk I won’t but it would still be a nice self care addition)

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Jake Engle @Jake_Engle

4 years ago

Bring back gingerbread lattes you COWARDS‼️ @Starbucks

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

4 years ago

To the “friends” who’ve made me feel crazy 🖕🏻vm.tiktok.com/ZMREoFnbY/

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

4 years ago

My night’s not complete until I throw ‘bows at a man in Vineyard Vines shirt who has no boundaries.

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

4 years ago

My autocorrect just tried to change bitcoin to bitchface while I was editing a marketing email. SOS, send help, I can't go on.

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

4 years ago

My phone autocorrected pal to PSL. I hate myself.

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

4 years ago

My “leather” jacket smells like campfire and I’ve never been more sexually attracted to myself.

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

4 years ago

That mood when you’ll let a parent do anything to you but when they even look at your sibling the wrong way you prepare yourself to go to jail for parricide. 😡

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

5 years ago

If you ask me to edit something for you, just be aware that I will add Oxford commas and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.

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I clicked on an ad for a toddler dress ONE time because I thought it was for grown ups and now Facebook won't stop showing me painfully cute clothes that I want for myself but they're all for children. 😭 #imbaby

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

5 years ago

Omg vaccine yesterday and stimmy today?? Optimism feels terrifying in 2021 but... Blessings on blessings!

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

5 years ago

Had the most wholesome time playing Sims 3 all afternoon with my baby brother’s gf. ☺️

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

5 years ago

I go red hot like a demon 👹 I go ghost for no damn reason 👻

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

5 years ago

My Mormon uncle followed me on IG, send help.

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

5 years ago

Correct me if I'm wrong, but the day after going to the grocery store is better than Christmas. So many options!

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Moo Clara 🐄 @clarajmoses

5 years ago

No one better be expecting me to marry a straight man. HAVE YOU MET ONE? I'm not even saying I'm not willing to spend the rest of my life with one, but I'm not admitting to that shit on a legal document, are you kidding?