mike cyclops @kylefword
This twitter account is 100 percent serious. I'm an adult. Denver, CO Joined December 2011-
Tweets2K
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Following269
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mike cyclops retweeted
imagine trying to explain this to someone from 2006
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mike cyclops retweeted
Before u leave the house, think of the acronym 'WOWEE' Wallet phOne Wkeys Egg Egg (backup)
Literally heard on the conference call this morning: "Everyone just hide under your desk and cry, you get to go home in 10 hours."
Would you work 60 hours a week for 33k and benifits? 18 year old me: eh I'll probably make 6 figures out of school. Now: plz don't fire me
The hot take I gave to the boys: "I think we cracked to many cold ones on a Thursday."
It's been two hours. Cracking cold ones with the boys has turned into 'Can I make it to 730 meeting on time?'
mike cyclops retweeted
It's almost as though don rickles is zinging God in heaven, except there's no heaven, God doesn't exist & Don rickles is just dead Eat arbys
mike cyclops retweeted
every single person you've ever loved will either go to your funeral or you will go to theirs. Afterwards, why not go to arbys?
mike cyclops retweeted
When you're at the party, but really you just want to be home practicing sax.
mike cyclops retweeted
The Last Samurai (2003)
mike cyclops retweeted
If, like me, you googled the word fascism recently, maybe give it a week before you start floating it around in public.
Any time I get disappointed in the direction my country is going, something comes along to restore the faith.
Any time I get disappointed in the direction my country is going, something comes along to restore the faith.
mike cyclops retweeted
Look I believe in evolution up to the point it says I came from a monkey. I can feel it in my bones I used to be one of those muscular cows.
mike cyclops retweeted
Tonight as half the nation cries and the other half enthusiastically fucks members of their immediate family, remember: Arbys exists for now
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