Matt Demon @scottram5
It’s demon time Joined December 2013-
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Whole Mariners rotation is gonna take a breathalyzer test to decide who’s starting tonight
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My two goats
Can’t tell which is more painful: doing my taxes, staring at the eclipse, or watching this Mariners offense
Sorry about that earthquake New York. I was just locking in
Scott Ramseyer (paper cut on the webbing between his fingers) has been placed on the IR and will miss the rest of the season
Liberals today just don’t want you to put the lime in the coconut and shake it all up
When Harry Potter walked in on Fluffy sleeping
Pet peeve: anyone that exists in an airport at the same time as me
Currently updating my fantasy football roster while getting a pedicure. This must be what it feels like to be a Swiftie
Accidentally said “holy shit” in a church from 800 BC today. I’m on high alert
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