Brandy Ford @brandyford
I like witty banter and sunshine. Pencils and typewriters make me feel all fluttery inside. Yep. I’m nerdy & I nerd it. I also write things. brandyford.ca Niagara Joined March 2009-
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Following330
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Clearing clutterw/Ry Inadvertently made direct eye contact w/an adorable puffer fish beanie she put in yard sale pile. Now I’m secretly orchestrating escapes & setting up new lives for stuffies under my bed. #springcleaning #yardsale #momlife #clearclutter #beaniebabies
Just spent an hour convincing 4 strangers to perform the intro of Brooklyn 99’s Backstreet Boys with me in front of the room at the wedding to get syd & zach to kiss. Either the drinks kicked in or I am totally epic. I was #1. You are my fireeee.
Ever been stuck on a bus with a bunch of elementary school boys playing some sort of Game of Farts for points? Air quality level is -90 right now, my eyes are stinging & I am trapped in this vessel for another hour. #classtrip #farts #momlife
Success! I did not misplace any of my kids, made it back to the bus 10 minutes EARLY and even rescued some lost kid along the way. Yet, apparently, I don’t get any kind of reward for this. Apparently this is just what “normal” people do?
“Oh my god! It’s Linus!” Geeked out & made my group get a pic with him. They had more of a #charliebrown “good grief” energy, but we got the shot! Wait a minute- Holy crap! Is that #snoopy ?! Let’s go, kids! @WonderlandNews #classtrip #momlife #smile
Need to meet bus at 4:45 & now I’m a little stressed. I’M the responsible one? Bet I need to bring home the same 4 kids I started with too. Did a head count & all seem to be here. In fact, I’ve added a stray or two. Rather have too many kids than not enough. Right? #momlife
Was offered a piece of #thrillsgum & excitedly shouted “soap gum!” in unison with a kid & made them all laugh with my wit. We’re bonded. I’m a cool kid now. I’ve waited my whole life for this. @WonderlandNews #classtrip #momlife #soapgum #coolkid #laughatme
Heading to @WonderlandNews right now on a #classtrip with my kid. In a span of 10 min I have embarrassed her at least 21 times. #coachbus #momlife
Ever have to run out on your front deck wrapped in nothing but a bath towel and wave casually to the neighbours because the damn puppy escaped the back yard? Umm. Yeah. Me neither. Ugh. #thisismylife #puppylife #nakedinthefrontyard
ME: 5 months ago, organizing all the winter stuff into very specific bags, “You’re a genius! No scrambling THIS year when the snow comes!” ME: now, searching in closets, under beds and even the fkn fridge, “Where the hell are my damn boots!” #adhd #momtweets #thestruggleisreal
Marketing scams like this infuriate me! I came here specifically for the infants. Now you’re telling me they aren’t even included? The hell am I supposed to with all the really tiny shoes I just bought? #falseadvertisement #outofcontext #shoes #infants #shoesale
“Those are some nice dowels.” is a sentence I just said to myself in the #reusestore. My urge to grab at least 10 of them for some unknown future project is overwhelming. #crafters #dowels #helpme #whatadeal.
Me: eats cereal directly from the box. Also Me: gets excited about a serving tray I see on sale & think of all the opportunities I’ve missed in life. Not owning this item is obviously why I don’t get served breakfast in bed! Hell ya! I’m a fancy person now, ya’ll!
It’s not Christmas until Dave cooks the turkey….#thevinylcafe #dave #stuartmclean #christmas #christmasstories
Make a list?Check. Mentally prepare for interactions with stressed out crowds? Check. Remember to put on pants? Yeah. I’m gonna have to circle back on that. I mean pjs are practically stand-ins for sweats when you work from home, so I’m good, right? #fml #momlife #christmas
When you think you have one more day to “get it all done” & they cancel school due to a pending snowstorm. Way to accelerate my procrastination process, Mother Nature. Seriously. Go have a cup of tea with Mrs. Claus & your sons the Miser brothers & lighten up on the flurries…
Me & my kid waiting in school for show to start. Me: Let’s get a selfie together! She glances around to make sure no-one sees and “hurries” me up. Which, as you know, guarantees I’m gonna do this all night now. She looks more miserable than Grinch before his heart grew 3 sizes.
Go check out all the #christmasstories #comedy #writers #santa
Go check out all the #christmasstories #comedy #writers #santa
When you’re all wrapped in blankets, nestled right in and @PrimeVideo asks if you’re still watching @UploadOnPrime and the remote is on the the other side of the couch. I need a remote for the remote. #stillwatching #lifewoes #ugh #passtheremote #cozy #lazydaylife #upload #couch
Trausau @trausau77154
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mike bullard @MikeBullard1997
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TS Jelena Vermilion -.. @IsisIntrepid
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The-Writer-and-The-Wi.. @Writer_and_Wit
7 Followers 24 Following Media outlet created in April 2022 by writer Brandy Ford w/strong focus on comedy and also people, businesses & groups making a difference in their communities.
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Briar Rose - Independ.. @CozyHomeScents
6 Followers 24 Following I love how scent can make a memory come alive! 🌸 Safe, Family Friendly Scents, Decor, Home & Body! Thanks for joining me on my journey! #scentsylife
awΛke🎧🔊 @iamawakemusic
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137K Followers 151K Following Find the best free and bargain kindle and nook books by signing up at http://t.co/RyEnwy0obn
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Drink Critically @DrinkCritically
1K Followers 4K Following I asked my wife if I was funny and she said I was handsome.
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35K Followers 39K Following Certified Water & Tea Sommelier - Follow my journey from tea bag dunker to Tea Master! What is in your mug today?
Meier Family Organic .. @MeierOrganic
172 Followers 99 Following The Meier Family Organic Farm is a Certified Organic Farm in Welland Ontario, Canada. Lamb, Goats, seasonal vegetables, Honey and more!
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57 Followers 134 Following Member of the Organizing Committee for The Memorial Ride for Residential School Children
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1K Followers 2K Following I am 42 and was just diagnosed in May with metastatic breast cancer. Now just living one day at a time with the time I have left.
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317 Followers 2K Following Educational technology evangelist and enabler. Avid scuba diver, sailor, and dog owner. Tweets & Opinions are my own.
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429 Followers 510 Following Writer, wife, dog mom, power yoga practitioner, wannabe farmer, reformed picky eater, blogger.Tweets are my own.
Jessica Torres @RedHeadJessT
22 Followers 61 Following Mother, Wife, I love watching movies with my family, chillin' together. Lovin' life!
McNally House Hospice @McNallyHospice
640 Followers 500 Following McNally House is a non-profit residence, providing free of charge 24-hr specialized palliative care to people and their families living with a terminal illness
OUTVisions Magazine @OUTVisionsMag
3K Followers 4K Following OUTVisions Magazine is a publication specifically designed for the #LGBT professional community. We're about having fun and enjoying life to its fullest.
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754 Followers 822 Following She/Her Partial to reading and writing #cheeky women's fiction. Author of #ThePerilsofPauline from Astor+Blue Editions.
Steve Henschel @AMoveableSteve
923 Followers 289 Following Former journalist. communications guy, seasoned photographer, one righteous dude
Luke Edwards @WriterLuke32
1K Followers 761 Following Editor for Niagara Farms at Granthaven Media and freelance journalist for @forterieradio. Rarely seen without a Jays hat on. Fan of soft returns
Scott Rosts @ScottRosts
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17K Followers 15K Following Toronto Events provides info on concerts and things to do. Follow our CEO @tatianajerome. For Events & Advertise Info: http://t.co/7a5tykcf4T
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201 Followers 124 Following I am the managing editor of The Tribune in Welland serving the communities of Welland, Pelham, Port Colborne and Wainfleet
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92 Followers 747 Following http://t.co/HDkFZNKYQf A FREE gluten free iPhone/Android restaurant finder. The world's largest celiac friendly restaurants.
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mike bullard @MikeBullard1997
38K Followers 4K Following I only cry at the end of Old Yeller but once in awhile I tear up at end of Dirty Harry.
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350 Followers 328 Following Toronto comedian/producer. Fueled by hipster coffee and estradiol. Gracefully promoting the queer agenda one dick joke at a time.
Emily Hampshire @emilyhampshire
181K Followers 868 Following Canadian actress from Montréal. I like bagels 🥯
The Westdale @TheWestdale
2K Followers 3K Following Hamilton's not-for-profit Cinema, Talk, Arts, & Music Venue.
Brian Witkowski @LucrativeArt
561 Followers 2K Following A business and mindset coach for artistic leaders and creative business owners seeking their next level of prosperity and purpose.
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Best Book Monkey Love.. @BBM_Suspense
7K Followers 7K Following Tweeting about Awesome Suspense Book Deals! 🔥📚⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️📚🔥 Part of the @BestBookMonkey Troop As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases
LOLCanada @canada_lol
130 Followers 312 Following The funniest comedians from the Great White North (and some tweets probably not from Canadians sometimes it's hard to keep track)
Mosaic - Hamilton @MosaicHamilton
448 Followers 151 Following Craft Beer Bar in #hamont 🍻 Mon-Thurs: 5pm — Midnight Fri: 5pm — 2am Sat-: 3pm — 2am Sun: 3pm — Midnight
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133 Followers 209 Following I'm the whole cast of Superbad if they had a baby.
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14K Followers 2K Following The Prairies Book Review provides first-rate editorial book reviews for indie authors and small publishers. Submit your book at our website to get a review.
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232 Followers 239 Following last Sunday of the month at Yuk Yuk's the Nubian Disciples of Pryor urban Comedy Revue. founded over 12 years ago by Host, Actor and Comedian, Kenny Robinson!
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50K Followers 18K Following Looking for your instant reactions. Creating Engagement One Post At a Time... I Ask Questions You Want to Answer. #SFB11 #SFB12 #SFB13
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7 Followers 24 Following Media outlet created in April 2022 by writer Brandy Ford w/strong focus on comedy and also people, businesses & groups making a difference in their communities.
My Daughter Elly +2 @MyDaughterElly
6K Followers 33 Following The journey of Elly’s life, & her younger sister & brother, from birth, through the eyes of their father. Real life experiences as we take on this adventure. 🌱Holy shit I can’t believe that @BryanCranston was at my show tonight @levitycomedyclub So cool to meet him thanks for the picture dude.✌🏻
my wife's coworkers like our dog more than me, and want her to bring the dog to work with her more often. "look at the little pupper! She has such a human face!" You know who else has a human face? Me. A human.
I wonder if the guy wearing a “cocaine is kool” shirt at the trampoline park is even legally allowed to be this close to so many kids
“Always thought I was someone, turned out I was wrong” is an all time lyric.
Me: you know what they say, sometimes you’re the fly, sometimes you’re the windshield My wife: why are you in the bathroom with me GET OUT
i normally don't post personal stuff. but my dog died the same week as the queen, here they are in heaven...
$20 a month to keep my blue check? Fuck that, they should pay me. If that gets instituted, I’m gone like Enron.
My wife is finally getting me to watch Gilmore Girls with her, and she asked if I knew the premise and I said “it’s a mother and daughter and they steal each other’s boyfriends, right?” And now I’m getting roasted on her friend’s group chat. HALLOWEEN BLOWS
Sometimes I get asked - how I manage to write every day? It helps that I write before going anywhere near social media. #WritingCommunity #WritersLife #WritersCommunity #WritersOfTwitter
“No, dad, not this song. Put on Bon Iver and Taylor Swift” - my pretentious 5 year old at bed time
Spent too much of my life wishing for change instead of making a change...🤔 #MondayThoughts #MondayMood
Is it wrong to do something for the money. If it only pays 60 dollars?
It’s 7am, I’ve been up since 5am and I’ve managed an hour of writing. Not a bad start to the day… #WritersLife #WritersOfTwitter #WritersCommunity #WritingCommunity
“I love snack shopping with Dad,” says Ry. Translation: “Dad lets me pick out anything I want and doesn’t only buy the ‘good’ stuff when it is on sale.” #momlife #singleparentingwoes #shoppingwithdads
at an open mic and watching a new comic eat from a box of premium plus crackers before his set. I have a lot of questions. All of them “why”
stayed at the Arts Hotel for our last few days in Charlottetown. The amount of people I’ve heard in the lobby complain about the lack of TV is mind boggling. Media is at our finger tips, and entertainment is on every corner. Just chill out and go to sleep.
#PrettyHardCases #Season2 live and direct (you know what I mean) on @Netflix_CA TODAY!!!! Go get it!!!! ❤️🇨🇦📺
Evening, Lake Scugog Tom Thomson 1911
a lot of comedians have reached out to tell me that we did our wedding "the right way" and it makes me well up with pride because even on my wedding day I live seeking validation from other comedians
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