JR @jasonrut

When hockey announcers make all over a player for giving something to a fan. Like…I’m taking 20 seconds out of my warmup to lob a puck into the crowd to some kid, then wink at his hot mom. Fucking hero.

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

Do you ever botch a word so fantastically that MS Word can’t even help you? “Beurocratic” -Microsoft: “leucocratic”? wtf are you trying to say, dumbo?

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

If there’s one thing to be learned by watching old Columbo episodes, it’s that they used a lot of carpet in bathrooms and mens locker rooms in the 70s.

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

The best thing about home school is your entire house is a hot mic.

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

Do you remember where you were the day my TV died? (today)

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

This just in: Real Estate and Rogue Wave are not the same band.

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

I wonder who will finally break the glass ceiling in professional golf and show up at the next tour event with a face tattoo.

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

Top 3 “Charmed” episodes: ‘Something Wicca This Way Comes’, ‘Carpe Demon’, ‘Sin Francisco’. Honorable mention: ‘Mortality Bites’

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

Name a dumber invention than one-way streets.

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

Has anyone done a masterclass on flushing the toilet? (asking for my 10 yr old)

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

Every Real Estate investor under 40 is named Tyler.

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JR @jasonrut

4 years ago

Idk anything about writing a movie script, but I have to believe John Hughes got a good bit of satisfaction out of coming up with the line: “Ferris, he never drives it. He just rubs it with a diaper.”