Tiny Hard-Nips McGee @tiny_nips
https://t.co/JVUgQDkeSp Add-your-website.com Gerund-land Joined May 2015-
Tweets178
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Followers45
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Following186
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Likes51
You know it's gonna be a bad day when it's 14.39 and you still waiting on your morning poo to arrive
Pffftt, I can't have missed that much over the past 3 yea-- OH MY HOLY FLAMING-HOT TINY NIPS. The world's on fire and now I get to use 280 characters to poorly synopsise my existential dread! Get in. firefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefirefire
More of a 340.29 metres per second napper? CONGRATULATIONS! You're a sound sleeper! #Makesthethoughtsstop
Ever nodded off whilst travelling 299,792,458 metres per second? CONGRATULATIONS! You're light sleeper.
Spanish music teachers are a lot more agreeable. They're all "Sí, Sí, Sí."
Arrogant music teachers are the worst. They're all "me, me, me."
@thisherejimothy I will try*. Jesus, mate. Sort your shit out
[About to get Will Smith 'Jiggy Wit It'] Sexy Lady from Bar: So, what's your favourite position? *Winks* Me: *Sobbing* The Foetal Position.
I feel sorry for all the watersports enthusiasts of the world. They might have to face the horrible fact that Trump is one of them.
What do you call it when Batman renounces Our Sweet Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ? A Christian Bail
Doctor Who stole the idea for the TARDIS from the clown car #thinkoftheclowns
Limp Sync Battle: It's like Lip Sync Battle except better because it will only feature songs by Limp Bizkit @limpbizkit @SpikeLSB
I'm so insecure my girlfriend has started calling me QWERTY and 12345678 #mostcommonpasswordsof2016
Looked up 'toned' in the dictionary: Great definition.
When someone says "I'm but a man" with a soft 'a' I pretend they're standing on top of a building shouting their superhero name #butterman
Who decided to give porn sites the domain extension .xxx and not .cum? #loadsbetter
I've just won gold in the Olympic precipitation event. I'm the raining champion.
Me: You packed, Barry? It's time to hit the road. [A&E waiting room, Barry cradles a broken hand] Me: You're an idiot.

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philosophy memes 🔗 @philosophymeme0
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