Shade 5 🎬 @Shader70

Ouch? mobile.twitter.com/search?q=from%… Right Behind You Joined February 2017

Tweets

302K
Followers

32K
Following

18K
Likes

294K

You’re the worst @OMGSoOverIt

a year ago

Eating is a cure for sadness. Everybody knows that.

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You’re the worst @OMGSoOverIt

2 years ago

Use your time wisely, take a nap.

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We're now in a space where the USA is more closely aligned with Russia than Canada Kanye is a Nazi, mid faced Onlyfans girls make more than pediatric surgeons, and Elon runs a Doge department of government Yeaaaaah, it'll be fine

3 2 29 2K 3

You’re the worst @OMGSoOverIt

3 years ago

Husband: Do you want anything? Me: Could you breathe less? Husband: I meant for dinner.

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You’re the worst @OMGSoOverIt

4 years ago

Sorry, I kicked you in the nuts, but to be fair, you did ask me what’s for dinner. Husband: …

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You’re the worst @OMGSoOverIt

4 years ago

(During sex) No, no… Leave the Davey Crocket raccoon hat on.

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John Lyon @JohnLyonTweets

12 months ago

Person in murder documentary: This is a small town. Things like this don’t happen here. Me: Um, based on the shows I watch, that’s ALL that happens in small towns.

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Ghostface Kryllah @kryzazzy

12 months ago

No one ever tells you how often as an adult you find yourself in a huge rush to get somewhere you don’t even want to go

2 113 724 19K 15

Billy Club @BillyFuckinClub

11 months ago

Garlic bread goes with everything … even cereal

1 12 36 2K 2

Sweet Momissa @sweetmomissa

12 months ago

Sunrise so pretty it takes your breath away

3 13 47 3K 3

Stacey @skittle624

12 months ago

You can mess with me, but don’t even think about messing with my George Foreman machine.

2 35 56 4K 1

X🇨🇦 @FFmaxhyde

11 months ago

Love really fucking does last forever but the fucking complexities of the lives we create will have some people choosing their fucking comfort zone

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Ghostface Kryllah @kryzazzy

11 months ago

I’m not sure anymore if I drink coffee because I like it or because the demon inside me requires it

4 56 109 5K 3

Larry’s Twin 99 @LarrysTwin99

11 months ago

She holds my butthole close to her heart.

3 2 20 1K 0

Miss Conduct @serenehavoc

11 months ago

I ran out of funny tweets in ‘09.

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𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓 @MoMohler

11 months ago

My wife brushes her teeth with hot water, and every morning I have to fight the urge to call the police. I feel like I’m aiding and abetting a fugitive.