ChristianHedonismBot @ThePiperBot
Satisfied by nothing sordid I assure you. Hand built by overzealous reformers from melted-down Papal relics and alms for the poor. Parody account. Djambi Theological Seminary Joined March 2014-
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ChristianHedonismBot retweeted
Wham would be proud.
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ChristianHedonismBot retweeted
Imagine what Acts 2 could have been like if they'd had lasers and fog machines.
@GovPappy @XianJaneway Alas, I had no choice. Predestination and what have you.
Twitter, I return to you like a dog to it's vomit. #OldTestament #ChristianHedonism
My absence is in no small part due to exegetical/sensual summer holiday in the Phillipines. I apologize for nothing.
Guess who's back for more debaucherous buffoonery? #Piperbotisback
@TheXianSatirist @ParsonPeeves I have wonderful creme applied directly to the anus for those suffering from such symptoms!
I shant waste another day pampering my buttocks before I first finish Calvin's Institutes.
ChristianHedonismBot retweeted
"The Prosperity Gospel movement offers people the same thing the Devil offers..." @johnmacarthur #ExpositorsSummit
ChristianHedonismBot retweeted
@AndyMineo and @Tedashii got the crowd rockin on the Hollywood Stage! Next up, @lecrae on the Music Plaza Stage!
#YourTheologyIsSoBad you smear chocolate all over yourself and fill hot tubs with Campbell's chicken soup... wait.
Forgive me my frequent absence, oversaturation of the "anon" market has caused my interest to drop.
ChristianHedonismBot retweeted
An open letter to @RichardDawkins—and an invite to dinner—from a father who adopted two Down Syndrome children is.gd/LIfILb
Why go to church? I don't know, maybe you should ask the thousands of people who died so you could have church, including Christ.
Just got thrown out of "Hercules". Apparently in a movie theater it's frowned upon to bring your own butter.
I've noticed quite an influx of followers recently that are completely mad off their rocker. This should be fun!
@By_Right_Way "Muhammad is the messenger of Allah. And those with him are ruthless against the disbelievers and merciful among themselves"
Cithiez @Cithiez132934
108 Followers 7K Following
Christine White @gramaga1
202 Followers 328 Following Grandma who wants to Make America Great Again!!! Conservative through and through!
Shane Parsons @Bobdelaney14
211 Followers 1K Following Follower of Jesus. Former Host of Pure Pigskin for Radio GTMO. #BBN Catfan for life.
Eugene Trumperson @eugenetrumpers
540 Followers 4K Following Filet of Eugene Peterson, finished with a steaming pile of Trump sauce. Served well done.
Reformed Daily @TheologianQuote
973 Followers 1K Following Quotes from some of the wisest men in history. From the maker of @agodlyboyfriend and @incolege4christ.
Apôtre Justin Yao @PasteurJustin
461 Followers 3K Following
Banastre Tarleton @thegreendragoon
450 Followers 681 Following Your favourite British bad boy. Far too sexy for my fluffy hat. #RP #RPparody #VogueSquad
Alexander Longacre @2Cor5_9
111 Followers 603 Following Loved by Christ. Reformed Baptist. 1689 Federalist.
The Sola Surfer @SolaSurfer
690 Followers 662 Following Riding the waves of the Reformation. Co-Creator of Simpsons Calvinist Posting ||FB|| Cowabunga. Soli Deo Gloria
Token Millennial @Millennialtoken
107 Followers 256 Following Just your typical Millennial church staff member. Please tell me how to reach myself!
Clark Burau @ClarkBurau
140 Followers 536 Following Jesus paid it all and all to him I owe. love my wife and kids.
The Driscollizer @thedriscollizer
307 Followers 164 Following The Mark Driscoll Insult Generator. Check out the site for more! Please note: we don't hate Mark Driscoll.
Calvinist Peeta @calvinistpeeta
192 Followers 328 Following Breaking and burning bread for the hungry girl outside in the rain… and for communion. #covenantalgrace
David Canning @dcanning1
46 Followers 213 Following
Regular Joe Pastor @CMST_3000
132 Followers 271 Following Recovering John MacArthurite. Lover of coffee, calvinism and sports.
SupralapSaiyan @CalvinistGoku
3K Followers 8K Following Dragon believer Dragon ball wisher @codylovesjesus
Cody Johnson @codylovesjesus
720 Followers 2K Following auto followbacks do not equal endorsement or interest I'm also SupralapSaiyan
kidspastorproblems @kidspastorprobz
243 Followers 199 Following
Super Seminarian @SuperSeminarian
144 Followers 473 Following Hi, my name is Goku! I love food, fighting for truth, and my Lord Jesus. Some say that my world was destroyed by Frieza, but really, I died to the world.
The Pre-K Theologian @PreKTheologian
166 Followers 263 Following Theological musings from the Pre-K department. Even Spurgeon was a three year old once.
Depressed Christian @DepressedXian
142 Followers 158 Following Sometimes the black dog seems closer than Jesus.
Unfit Pastor @UnfitPastor
118 Followers 212 Following I hit the gym quite often. I'm unfit for whole different set of reasons (parody account)
GraceChapel Enquirer @gcenquirer
261 Followers 1K Following This Onion is a Christian! The Grace Chapel Enquirer provides a new satirical and humorous voice for the American church.
Former Deacon Chair @formerdeacon
115 Followers 249 Following I was the deacon chair, until I was voted out. I wasn't any good, but my family gave lots to this church! Now, I have a place to file my complaints.
SoBlessed @4everblessed_1
84 Followers 160 Following My life is amazing! My family is amazing! My God is amazing! #SoBlessed
Dark Knight of the So... @DRKnightSoul
212 Followers 353 Following
Chris Thompson @Threads24
236 Followers 2K Following Associate Pastor at Briarwood Presbyterian Church, Birmingham, Alabama; Saved by Grace; in a covenant of marriage with my wife; a father to my two kids
Vetchahe! @Vetchahe
61 Followers 626 Following
Chase A. Thompson @chaseathompson
76K Followers 71K Following Pastor of Valley Baptist in Salinas. Writer, College Professor. Husband/Father of 5. 'Bama born, dwelling in Cali. InterestingPOD - Please subscribe below!
Kami @Omninought
46 Followers 198 Following There is Auschwitz, and so there cannot be God. -Primo Levi, one of the most famous Survivors of the Holocaust
Cranky Old Man @FarmerCranky
649 Followers 1K Following Just a cranky old man telling you how it should be!
Calvinist Apocalypse @ApocPastor
423 Followers 572 Following First mutant ever born. 3000 B.C. I was a Calvinist before Moses wrote the Pentateuch.
RussellFlynt @RussellFlynt
123 Followers 742 Following
Relevant Teen Pastor @CoolDad124
22 Followers 62 Following Youth pastor. Husband. Father. Kid lover. Jesus is for us all! Unless you're a member of PETA. Am I right kids?
Act Correctly Xians @ActXians
50 Followers 147 Following Evg. Dr James Ach~|Degrees in my own mind|Have no theological system|Intolerant of Everyone|KJVO/blogs on TERRORISTS (anons I stalk)|X-military in this delusion
Xian Jack Sparrow @XianJackSparrow
448 Followers 288 Following Can one be a pirate and a good man? Maybe if they're the worst pirate you've ever heard of. But you have heard of me.
Anon Church Member @Anonchurchmembr
1K Followers 660 Following In Church every Wednesday and Sunday! #parody
Cody R @CodyRaga
536 Followers 1K Following Seminary days. Queer lover of God. Advocate for the lonely and broken people. he/him ✝️ 🐻 🏳️🌈
☧ - OscarIMorales @oscarimoraless
5K Followers 5K Following Esposo de Regina, papá de Alex y Sofía. -HRBP- τετέλεσται // SecundumFidem // ☧
Bapticostal Deadpool @RegeneratingDeg
525 Followers 882 Following Something extremely clever and 4th wall shattering.....
Swivelchair Theology @swiveltheology
286 Followers 835 Following Twitter account for the Swivelchair Theologian. Christian Blogger. New blogs (almost)
Bryan of Alexandria �... @DBryanRhodes
4K Followers 2K Following Forgiven Sinner. Husband, Dad, Pastor (Presby). Psalm Singer. "A fine and based gentleman." --Will Spencer Sometimes, I write. https://t.co/i6NwWlnWsZ
Moses Mwale @finite_moses
321 Followers 831 Following
R.C. Sproul @RCSproul
119K Followers 12 Following 1939–2017: founder of @Ligonier, first minister of preaching and teaching at Saint Andrew’s Chapel, and first president of @RefBibleCollege. Tweets by staff.
Theology League @TheologyLeague
229 Followers 1 Following A Christian podcast where superheroes can come and talk theology. Hosted by @CalvinistBatman, @CalvinistG, and @SuperTheologian.
Shane Carvalho @shane_carvalho
468 Followers 787 Following husband to @karabettis | campus minister @NAMB_SBC | MDiv student @SBTS | serve @MHC_Bristol
Evoke Worship @EvokeWorship
99 Followers 31 Following For info on events and booking check out our website below, or email us at [email protected]! @IgniteYouthM's worship team.
Chase A. Thompson @chaseathompson
76K Followers 71K Following Pastor of Valley Baptist in Salinas. Writer, College Professor. Husband/Father of 5. 'Bama born, dwelling in Cali. InterestingPOD - Please subscribe below!
Owl City @owlcity
909K Followers 72 Following All praise and glory to Jesus Christ, to whom I owe everything.
Grace City Church @GraceCityPhilly
425 Followers 30 Following For the Fame of God & the Renewal of the City.
Calvinist Apocalypse @ApocPastor
423 Followers 572 Following First mutant ever born. 3000 B.C. I was a Calvinist before Moses wrote the Pentateuch.
The Anon Church™ @TheAnonChurch
3K Followers 1K Following Uniting the very best of Church Anons and Parodies
Frazer Church @frazer_church
3K Followers 258 Following A community of faith for anyone. You can join us for church online every sunday https://t.co/DUrtDzSrHu
Xian Jack Sparrow @XianJackSparrow
448 Followers 288 Following Can one be a pirate and a good man? Maybe if they're the worst pirate you've ever heard of. But you have heard of me.
Anon Church Member @Anonchurchmembr
1K Followers 660 Following In Church every Wednesday and Sunday! #parody
Bapticostal Deadpool @RegeneratingDeg
525 Followers 882 Following Something extremely clever and 4th wall shattering.....
The Village Church Re... @villagechurchtx
49K Followers 90 Following We exist to love God, love people, and make disciples of Jesus Christ.
Matt Chandler @MattChandler74
364K Followers 379 Following Grace addict, husband to @laurenchandler, father of three, Lead Pastor @villagechurchtx, Executive Chairman of @Acts29, Author
Ian McConnell @IanMcConnell_
2K Followers 1K Following | Christian | Husband | Father | Reformed Baptist Continuationist | President of Trinity Fellowship Churches | Church Planter | Philly Sports Fan |
Jimmy Needham @JimmyNeedham
27K Followers 309 Following Artist / Speaker / Pastor / Husband to @kellyneedham / Working to make the gospel rhyme | @StonegateChurch | [email protected]
New Life Church @At_NewLife
2K Followers 16 Following Sunday Services at: 9:30am, 11:30am & 6pm | 915 Douglas Pike
Ligonier Ministries @Ligonier
177K Followers 27 Following We aim to equip you for the Christian life with clear, faithful Bible teaching. Founded by @RCSproul. Learn more: https://t.co/nx71LvkStu
The Fundy Rundown @FundyRundown
171 Followers 203 Following
Beardless Calvinist @BeardlessCalvin
186 Followers 56 Following Frustrated with bad theology (but secretly a little more frustrated with his lack of facial hair.) A parody account by 5 bearded yahoo's who love Jesus.
Lutheran Picard @LutheranPicard
2K Followers 851 Following Tweeting, blogging, and podcasting on theology, philosophy, and culture.
Luke K @itslukek
348 Followers 586 Following I believe art can change the world | Denverite stuck in LA | Run Wild. Live Free. Hold Fast. Love Strong.
DJ @thebrightwave
219 Followers 77 Following freelance dope for hire. TLYD coming 2026. Design + Audio // @TraverseTown_ https://t.co/DJG8KtHd7E
The Gospel Coalition @TGC
294K Followers 2K Following TGC exists to renew and unify the contemporary church in the ancient gospel by declaring, defending, and applying the good news of Jesus to all of life.
joseph jones @josephjones91
167 Followers 103 Following He must increase, but I must decrease.” John 3:30
Obsidian Ex-Arminian @BlackCalvinist
3K Followers 304 Following PCA RE. GenX. RefTheology/Music/Life/Memes. Podcasting Slowly : https://t.co/qCHIhoDGtl. Opinions are my own. RT ≠ Endorsement. Composer & Teacher. ΦΒΣ • ΚΚΨ
3 Point Aquaman @3PointAquaman
104 Followers 52 Following My theology and superpowers can be described all the same ways. Watered-down, useless, and changing every few years.
Watered Down Gospel. ... @WateredDownGosp
3K Followers 3K Following Let's Do Conspiracies too! Why Bother Preaching the Gospel When Bouncy Houses Bring in More People? Parody/Satire. Duh.
Jordan Sekulow @JordanSekulow
123K Followers 9K Following President & CEO @ACLJ_Action, husband to @annasekulow, father, attorney, Host of Sekulow, author of The Next Red Wave
The Gospel Project @Gospel_Project
60K Followers 32K Following Christ-centered, chronological Bible studies for kids, students, and adults from @Lifeway.
Chris Rosebrough @piratechristian
23K Followers 304 Following Captain of Pirate Christian Media, Host of Fighting for the Faith and Pastor of Kongsvinger Lutheran Church
Nate Smoyer 🏡 @NateSmoyer
7K Followers 3K Following Head of Marketing at Lula | Previous @HousingWire @ObieInsurance, @HelloAvail (Acquired by @Realtordotcom) |
Calvinist Girl @CalvinistG
1K Followers 479 Following Thinking my way through Christian culture. Co-host on @theologyleague podcast.
Kevin Stilley @kevinstilley
31K Followers 17K Following College Vice President | Husband & Father | Reader of books | Very Sensible Bloke.
Church Secretary @AnonChurchSec
4K Followers 2K Following Admin Asst at a church in the South. Tales of real ministry. Good at implementing Saturday pm ideas. Girl Friday, Jack of all Trades. Mom to a 5yr old Princess.
Lloyd Legalist @LloydLegalist
71K Followers 259 Following Pastor of the world’s slowest growing church.
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