Obviously not a news headline, at least not yet, it’s #SatireNews and also a prediction by our our analysts and futurists who believe the Fed will finally cut interest rates, if not this month, probably sometime this summer.

Paw Patrol’s Rubble Seriously Injured in Workplace Accident, Ryder accused of not following safety regulations buff.ly/3wFjfIn #pawpatrol #rubble #rubbleonthedouble #chase #skye #marshall #theonion #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Opinion: The Dad from Bluey Must Be Stopped buff.ly/4a1eHdG #bluey #blueysdad #bandit #banditheeler #dadlife #theonion #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Local Angler Unimpressed by Son’s Tiny Catch buff.ly/48D0jah #trophyfish #fishing #panfish #fishingdad #berkley #bassproshop #dadlife #theonion #funny #humor #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Siblings in Shock as Mom Buys Extra Large Bowl, Shattering Dreams of Escaping Dreaded Bowl Haircut buff.ly/3Imt28v #bowlcut #haircut #momlife #dadlife #theonion #reducestress #satirenews #tattletaletimes

“Stop or I’ll Say Stop Again!” Yells Mom Known for Empty Threats buff.ly/3V15nC8 #gentleparenting #momlife #dadlife #stoporillsaystopagain #satire #theonion #reducestress #satirenews #funny #parentinghumor #tattletaletimes

Opinion: Why Buy Lemonade From This Kid’s Lemonade Stand When I Can Make Better At Home?buff.ly/432r72w #lemonadestand #lemonade #smallbusiness #momlife #dadlife #theonion #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Joe Rogan Experience Podcast Features First Child Guest Alec Jones buff.ly/4diNmpw #joerogan #jre #joeroganexperience #itsentirelypossible #podcast #satirenews #theonion #tattletaletimes

$200 Applebee’s Date Night Pass Sends Divorce Lawyers into Feeding Frenzy buff.ly/3wBDOVU #appebees #datenight #applesbeesdatenightpass #theonion #satirenews #funny #parentinghumor #tattletaletimes

Amazon Introduces Fire Sticky: Pre-sticky Tablet Straight from the Factory buff.ly/3Ikh8fx #amazon #tablettime #whyiseverythignsticky #amazonfire #jeffbezos #bezos #momlife #dadlife #theonion #satirenews #tattletaletimes

#satire #parody #satirenews #parodynews #aoc

Poor Family Dog Has Not Been to the Dog Park Since Baby Was Born buff.ly/3SXAUm2 #dogpark #dogmom #dogs #momlife #dadlife #theonion #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Local Mom Paints Kitchen Cabinets a Trendy Sage Green In Attempt To Fill Gaping Void In Soul buff.ly/42Wa5mP #sagegreen #trendy #kitchenremodel #paint #theonion #pinterest #hgtv #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Scientists Discover “Big Bone” Gene, Overweight Children Everywhere Rejoice buff.ly/42QYOEh #bigboned #genes #dna #theonion #cartman #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Unfortunate Child Named “Not Me” Accumulates 30 Life Sentences Worth of Grounding Due To Lying Children Nationwide buff.ly/49uXv0n #momlife #dadlife #notme #lies #theonion #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Desperate Army Recruiters Visit Preschool, Sign Hundreds of New Recruits Who Don’t Understand the Seriousness of their Decision buff.ly/3xxz305 #usarmy #america #military #preschool #momlife #dadlife #theonion #satirenews #tattletaletimes

Treatment of Pet Hamster by Girl Chilling Foreshadowing of How She Will Parent Her Future Children buff.ly/3Tf8pRZ #petcare #hamster #tattletaletimes #theonion #satirenews

High School Football Star Unmasked as 23-Year-Old buff.ly/48xwt6W #highschoolfootball #football #theonion #howdoyoudofellowkids #satirenews #tattletaletimes