6⃣9⃣ Timeline Raider 🔫😇 @MindPassionate
emoji addict 🤪 I click ❤️ & 🔃 a lot! 😊 mostly funny stuff 🤭 mixed with raunchy🤤 romantic💗 poetic📝 & inspirational sprinkles ✨ follow at your own risk 😛 twitter.com/search?f=tweet… Hesse, Germany Joined July 2018-
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“I wish you weren’t so hard on me but I also don’t want you to become cold.” Me, to noodles* *My partner** **jk it was noodles*** ***my partner’s nickname is noodles
If she left me for someone Better looking: Sure Smarter: Makes sense Richer: Congrats! Funnier: Oof.
It's not a secret that I want to fuck you in every way possible
Why is it called going balls to the wall and not wallnuts?
I respect people who admit their mistakes and apologize.
I'm not scared of dying But I do have grave concerns
Let's celebrate! Nice! @LostGirl2323 named @stewteee's tweet the best of the day. Booyah! x.com/stewteee/statu…
Let's celebrate! Nice! @LostGirl2323 named @stewteee's tweet the best of the day. Booyah! x.com/stewteee/statu…
People who misspell "sweetie" as sweaty: who hot you?
The lady at my coffee shop told me to stay warm out there, and I was like: It’s 50 below in Canada, I’ll be alright. Twitter has made me into such a worldly guy.
Me: I refuse to play your fucking mind games! Also me: *makes the first move
Will you be my friend? (Asking for a friend.)
I was showing one of my daughters a pretty outfit I just got in the mail today and of all things to say, she went with “But where would you even wear something that nice?”. And honestly, I don’t know either.
You realize a taco is essentially a cheeseburger with cumin, right?
I put the “mess” in messy bun.
Not a lot of people outside of London know that it’s actually the bell that is called Big Ben not the clock. The clock is called Mark
Thank you for lighting the way.....
Yeah you’re lovers but does he know your real name?
President Warren G. H.. @PopeAwesomeXIII
13K Followers 2K Following Commercially Inviable. ✌️ 29th US President (1921-1923) 🧐 Tip jar! https://t.co/Igf16XkzWv ❤ He/Him 👍 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏴☠️ ❤️ See pinned for migration infoADHDean @ADHDeanASL
23K Followers 5K Following BLACK LIVES MATTER. Husband, dad, friend. Ally. ASL Interpreter. Doofus. Midvale School for the Gifted alum. Mastodon: [email protected]Fomo Simpson @HaliPhacks
8K Followers 3K Following Keeping it funny on Twitter since its early days as a radio show. My tweets ➡️ https://t.co/Z2tnWjzeDxKate again @Kateness8
10K Followers 2K Following I’m doing amazing, sweetie • she/her • as seen on buzzfeed that one time • Reese’s Goblin • wishlist: https://t.co/mY0eO30PnDNate Limit Exceeded @.. @perlhack
22K Followers 6K Following @natesmith.jawns.club homeless pirate. sustainable, carbon-neutral tweets. butterfly whisperer. official soup taster. likes LEGOs BLM. He/Him.Vinod Chhaproo @Chhapiness
16K Followers 2K Following Domesticated Husband Father of 2 Ransacking Raccoons.Featured on @netflixfamily @buzzfeed @thedad IG @Chhapiness Shows & Inquiries-https://t.co/F6Q2TKOV1MTrey @treydayway
41K Followers 6K Following *Something profound* - @treydayway https://t.co/c64nfwFO1XRodney Lacroix @RodLacroix
43K Followers 6K Following Disappointing people since 1968. | EVERYTHING: https://t.co/JN2RmmKWfK | Latest Tweets: https://t.co/BuhDfbbFkq | Top Tweets: https://t.co/3B9KMSYvlvDadman Walking @dadmann_walking
56K Followers 1K Following introvert. Husband. Dad of 3. bourbon fund: Venmo- Shane83 My links! https://t.co/X1R5q5AVST seen in @Buzzfeed @Menshumor @HuffPostParents @cheezburStone @StoneAgeRadio13
9K Followers 2K Following Big smartass, small pond. Based on true events and other bullshit I made up. https://t.co/zWj3lHItCnDamnFineTweet @damnfinetweet
13K Followers 3K Following RIP DamnFineTweet 8/7/2019-4/27/2023 thank you for 85000 trophies and a million good vibes. I'll miss you!F. Scott Fitz Jesse (.. @FScottFitzJesse
8K Followers 6K Following I'm just here to make fun of myself.Boyd's Backyard™ @TheBoydP
102K Followers 20K Following I’d rather be working on my yard. #envydastrength I retweet regular people. My tweets are here: https://t.co/zOIJ18SHBVHe Called Me Greenhor.. @WhatsAGreenhorn
9K Followers 3K Following He called me Greenhorn. I called him Tony Randall. It was a thing we had.🦋Lænį Røšę �.. @parilani
6K Followers 1K Following lowercase human. been referred to as "ethereal. a non sequitur, if you will." --will answer astro questions for tips--Elsa Rotch @rot_els
52 Followers 5K FollowingElle Ree @elle_ree73999
85 Followers 5K FollowingRedkat5000 @Redkat5000
124 Followers 497 FollowingMarva Coswell @CosweMar
67 Followers 5K FollowingAK Blackthorne @akblackthorne
7 Followers 337 Following Composer | Musician | Philosopher I compose orchestral music that will take your mind on a journey. ⬇️ My Music ⬇️Romelia Pirollo @RPirol
38 Followers 5K FollowingSean Latam @LatamSean65517
41 Followers 5K FollowingAnastacia Dalla @AnastaciaD30989
35 Followers 5K FollowingMayola Constantin @MayolaCons1647
68 Followers 5K FollowingMiah Bertrano @MBertrano64453
98 Followers 5K FollowingArwa Holmen @arwa_holm
89 Followers 5K FollowingSTRANGE hedSpursNoles @hedN9NE
434 Followers 2K Following Spurs, Seminoles, and STRANGE.... music fanatic. Nothing special here, except for my undying loyalty. now.... Unofficial promoter of the shit I like!Xeter Xruught @xeterxruught
26 Followers 78 FollowingLeonard Robles @LeonardRobles11
1K Followers 2K Following💎ime St💝re 🐮.. @dimestorec0wgrl
30K Followers 17K Following 🚫21+ • not a bot • 🗑️poster • ☀️ 🌙 ✨ • legal disclaimer: it’s all fake • 👸🏼💅💚Melanie 🌨️₊˚... @melaniebshizzle
686 Followers 5K Following #Boss ♥️Mum♥️ 28.6.1949-25.5.2017 😇♥️♥️livin' in the uk 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧born & raised british!!🇬🇧🇬🇧LSU Fan Up North @br93765960
665 Followers 4K Following All praise and glory to Yahuah, Yeshua (Yahusha) and the Ruach Hakodesh!Die Ⓥeganerin 🌱 @DieVeganerin
989 Followers 1K Following 🌱 antispeciesist intersectional feminist #vegan🌱 linksgrünversifft #goVegan! Why? Watch this: https://t.co/hw5GDxuCG6 🌱 *329ppm #IchBinArmutsbetroffenSideshowBill 🏳️�.. @NTweetbin
2K Followers 4K Following Peace to all freaks! 🏳️🌈 420 SOCIALIST PROGRESSIVE NO MAGAts! Film Horror HALLOWEEN Books Music Ramones FRabbit TFC RK TNP REM Comics Gamer CubsDolphinspraktixing sloot @JudsForLaughs
158 Followers 594 Following Oversexed former tweaker. Loathe the pageantry of work + Love the pageantry of pageants.checkyourkidsatthedoo.. @checkyourkidsa2
835 Followers 357 Following I'm not good at this parenting thing. Attempting to raise 3 kids. Featured on ...nowhereBen Boven @bjboven
1K Followers 2K Following I write romantic comedies and apocalypse stories featuring the tiny house lifestyle. If that sounds cool, you're weird and I want to meet you.Waqar Ahmed Khan 🎯.. @WaqarAKhan
313 Followers 5K Following #AvidListener || #LifeLong #Learner | #DisruptiveMindset💡| #PurposeDriven | #Visionary || #Serving #Humankind | #Aiming to #Inspire #Create #Better #World🌍 |Christopher @cleveohioboy
148 Followers 294 FollowingGary K @zooranger1
435 Followers 2K Following retired exotic animal trainer/dog behaviorist. Loving every moment of my life! Trying to understand how that joke became president!!Thorn is over it @Thornbrow
2K Followers 4K Following Former account of Thorn, Lagging Balls podcaster. Over the Elon BS, peace out ✌️follow me: https://t.co/2ya9mS5MemMike 🇨🇦 🇬�.. @EdgeOfInsane63
1K Followers 2K Following Long tweets. 🚫 Twitter Assholes. Married. Blocked by: @thefoodprofessor. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen! — Harry S. Truman⤤ Thє Sweet Snob �.. @thesweetsnob
680 Followers 908 Following I think about weird '80s movie casting choices, undanceable electronic music, album cover art, and Chicago-style hot dogs. PG-13, probably.🌙 Mask Protection .. @eternalsailrmom
638 Followers 5K Following ♋ ✡️ 🏳️🌈 Actually Autistic ADHD Leftist Fuckterfs BLM (she/her) I REALLY FUCKING LOVE SAILOR MOONShit My Sons Say @ShitMySonsSayYo
36 Followers 161 Following 😆 Silly sayings from a pair of silly boysmrbeefy @Elroy851847221
127 Followers 515 Following a little bit of fun it's all about the curve DM FOR SOME FUNWhat are you going to.. @1999_jab
3K Followers 4K Following Just here for the lols/snark. If I lol I follow. Dad to 2 teens. Cat wrangler, gas-station hot dog connoisseur. A little lead guitar. What a time to be alive.😬◤✞ 𝐎𝐩𝐢.. @opiaticus
2K Followers 2K Following I am addicted to prescription glasses....If you block me you will not be getting my yearly Christmas card.Patty Evans @PattyEv85892834
210 Followers 1K Following ♡ 21yo ♡ Very submissive ♡ 7 days FREE golden member if you sign up using link below !! 😎Laura Thompson @LauraTh16359469
435 Followers 2K Following 𝟏𝟖+ #𝐌𝐅𝐂 𝐂𝐚𝐦𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 🇪🇸 Online model🤪 watch my last vids 💋 💝eric.wc @ewc_har
431 Followers 597 Following Please follow my new account: @ericwcharmon I’d really appreciate it!https://t.co/1cWBvhIgaNCarmen Ali @ca_af_
2K Followers 2K Following Comedian/Actor/Writer. Also I love cats and BTVS. 🐈⬛⚰️🌕 For Burlesque & Cabaret please follow @aprilfiasco_President Warren G. H.. @PopeAwesomeXIII
13K Followers 2K Following Commercially Inviable. ✌️ 29th US President (1921-1923) 🧐 Tip jar! https://t.co/Igf16XkzWv ❤ He/Him 👍 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏴☠️ ❤️ See pinned for migration infoLil Bit 🌈 @LizerReal
59K Followers 987 Following Wife of a guy. Mother to spawns. Sugar glider in my bra. Parenting cautionary tale. (she/her)ADHDean @ADHDeanASL
23K Followers 5K Following BLACK LIVES MATTER. Husband, dad, friend. Ally. ASL Interpreter. Doofus. Midvale School for the Gifted alum. Mastodon: [email protected]Fomo Simpson @HaliPhacks
8K Followers 3K Following Keeping it funny on Twitter since its early days as a radio show. My tweets ➡️ https://t.co/Z2tnWjzeDxKate again @Kateness8
10K Followers 2K Following I’m doing amazing, sweetie • she/her • as seen on buzzfeed that one time • Reese’s Goblin • wishlist: https://t.co/mY0eO30PnDcap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname
11K Followers 2K Following slowly backing away. TOP TWEETS: https://t.co/K8oKqyuL84 click below for recent. I’m the same guy at the other places.octopus/caveman @octopuscaveman
32K Followers 3K Following cool ranch icarus, painter of LoveBots, king of diarrhea jokesNate Limit Exceeded @.. @perlhack
22K Followers 6K Following @natesmith.jawns.club homeless pirate. sustainable, carbon-neutral tweets. butterfly whisperer. official soup taster. likes LEGOs BLM. He/Him..:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin
55K Followers 3K Following • goth daria vibes • fear does not exist in this bio • muppet enthusiast • reba/dolly 2024 • subscribe •Vinod Chhaproo @Chhapiness
16K Followers 2K Following Domesticated Husband Father of 2 Ransacking Raccoons.Featured on @netflixfamily @buzzfeed @thedad IG @Chhapiness Shows & Inquiries-https://t.co/F6Q2TKOV1MTrey @treydayway
41K Followers 6K Following *Something profound* - @treydayway https://t.co/c64nfwFO1XJason Not Evil @JasonNotEvil
17K Followers 4K Following Screenwriter and fart joke enthusiast Popular tweets: https://t.co/cVlfPJFRBKRodney Lacroix @RodLacroix
43K Followers 6K Following Disappointing people since 1968. | EVERYTHING: https://t.co/JN2RmmKWfK | Latest Tweets: https://t.co/BuhDfbbFkq | Top Tweets: https://t.co/3B9KMSYvlvKiss my Fat Ash🍑 @Tobi_Is_Fab
43K Followers 4K Following Sometimes on @BuzzFeed @HuffPostParents @Cheezburger @boredpanda @ThePoke @theCHIVE @TODAYshow @Upworthy❤️ Jeff Goldblum & Oxford commas. Avi by @popartcartoonzSneezingWithWetMascar.. @WetMascara
20K Followers 2K Following Yes, THAT Thanksgiving tweet. My Faves: https://t.co/90HdOEinlH Recent Tweets in Link Below.Dadman Walking @dadmann_walking
56K Followers 1K Following introvert. Husband. Dad of 3. bourbon fund: Venmo- Shane83 My links! https://t.co/X1R5q5AVST seen in @Buzzfeed @Menshumor @HuffPostParents @cheezburIndy @IndecisiveJones
19K Followers 886 Following husband, father, animation aficionado, man trapped in the body of a penguin, pfp by @obscureaaronStone @StoneAgeRadio13
9K Followers 2K Following Big smartass, small pond. Based on true events and other bullshit I made up. https://t.co/zWj3lHItCnpat++ @patsatweetin
14K Followers 969 Following Bulbasaur is the best starter. Spoony bard. Enemy of the letter 'W'DamnFineTweet @damnfinetweet
13K Followers 3K Following RIP DamnFineTweet 8/7/2019-4/27/2023 thank you for 85000 trophies and a million good vibes. I'll miss you!Scorp 🏴 @TheSuperScorp
40 Followers 758 Following He/Him / ace / anarchist? / proud owner of an autoimmune sickness / Also rabbit dadDie Ⓥeganerin 🌱 @DieVeganerin
989 Followers 1K Following 🌱 antispeciesist intersectional feminist #vegan🌱 linksgrünversifft #goVegan! Why? Watch this: https://t.co/hw5GDxuCG6 🌱 *329ppm #IchBinArmutsbetroffenMiss Moneypenny @MoneypennyNaked
48K Followers 7K Following The art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go & holding on. • Cat tweets: https://t.co/j9ulDA4QKNGinger Snapped ❤ @katy_fit
34K Followers 15K Following Martha Stewart & Erin Andrews Trapped in Anna Nicole's Body. Firmly Believe I Peaked in Life receiving the Presidential Physical Fitness Award in 4th grade.😷💉🌶S҉ picey.. @TiffHeartsTea
1K Followers 1K Following FUCK PUTIN •🕉• Vaxxed Artist • Mental health is life • Make the world a better place • empath • BLM • Equal opportunity feminist🦋ᵉᵇᵘˡˡⁱ�.. @mia734
9K Followers 1K Following 💥Living life my way,In my lane💥 Grateful for every day 🙏🏻 People facing homelessness are my people 🤝Jerps @JerpsBerps
1K Followers 986 Following Insane w/o membrane. Podcast co-host of: https://t.co/S0u3h0Uvlz Also I write movie reviews: https://t.co/cemCOKWInpValerie Rose🍓🌻 @ValerieRoseSF
4K Followers 4K Following Smart ass with a passion for words. Authenticity is powerful.𝖛𝖆𝖓𝖟 @vanzoverthemoon
2K Followers 2K Following 🖤 𝔢𝔫𝔤𝔞𝔤𝔢𝔡 to @dozerbos 🌹 - 𝔪𝔶 𝔭𝔢𝔱𝔰 𝔞𝔯𝔢 𝔢𝔳𝔢𝔯𝔶𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔫𝔤 - 𝔞𝔯𝔱, 𝔪𝔲𝔰𝔦𝔠 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔟𝔬𝔬𝔨 𝔩𝔬𝔳𝔢𝔯. 🖤FKA Molly @mistrustme1
96K Followers 14K Following Patron Saint of Sex-Positive Women - feminist @jennslowpez is my love. https://t.co/dTkdnBru8iThe Angel 🖤 @Angel_150913
12K Followers 5K Following ᛚ᛫ᚹ᛫ᛖ 🔆🚜🍻 ——————————— Farmer’s Daughter. Girl Mama. Viqueen. Advocate for others with different abilities.Amorous_soul4spirit @SoulAmorous
2K Followers 936 Following #writerscommunity #writerslift #amreading #amwriting #pitmad #vss365Rae's a little hell�.. @omgshuddup
33K Followers 11K Following I parallel parked correctly on the first try once.Garrett-will fix it @DaddyWithTwins
2K Followers 2K Following The link you are trying to access has been identified by Twitter or our partners as being potentially spammy or unsafeBourbon_NC🥃 @101Bourbon
834 Followers 1K FollowingDillon “Shitty Twee.. @libidinouslouie
310 Followers 535 Following clawing my way back to the surface https://t.co/b8D9b1odNK🏳️⚧️🏳�.. @murph_mama
5K Followers 4K Following https://t.co/wUIQeG7QET https://t.co/6LUbdvyZ5e she/hermartin bearne @BearneMartin
1K Followers 3K Following Stand up Comic, Actor and Writer. He/Him https://t.co/i95brKqdY1%…hdrk @thehdrk
4K Followers 1K Following Sensitive lumberjack poet Good Shit Saturdays 6-8pm central on https://t.co/cx4mqJnkHkKetamine (she/her) @Maybe_Ketamine
3K Followers 3K Following feminist || bi/pan 🏳️🌈 || 🇮🇳 || if you know me irl, no you don'tCMyBones @CyndiSaidMed
18K Followers 8K Following Adopts greyhounds & loves dogs.Come for the brains, stay for the boobs. Sexy librarian wanna be. https://t.co/2NENF8NtoeAuntie Social (parody.. @TraciGrrl
5K Followers 5K Following I'm probably going to just post whatever random garbage pops into my mind. I'm so odd I can't even. she/herTina the Displaced Te.. @TinaLovesTexas
6K Followers 1K Following I said, “Heyyy, heyyy, hey! What’s goin on?!” . IG: @tinalovestexas https://t.co/fcYZbk71qB💋Trudi💋 @TrueDee
30K Followers 3K Following Tread carefully, there's ridiculous pointless bullshit ahead. Trashing this place up a bit one stupid ass tweet at a time.Rachael Reid @harried_mum
180 Followers 413 Following When I am not being a boring lawyer, I am a harried mum to 2 boys. I am in the trenches of working and child rearing. Things happen. Sometimes I share!𝙣𝙖𝙥𝙤𝙡�.. @NapVeg
8K Followers 6K Following developer alt: @nexxai | black belt in yin yoga | vaccine enthusiast | 4 time therapy world champion | ▪️P▪️U▪️S▪️S▪️Y▪️ | avi by @gazpachomachine | he/himThe Ghost of Swan Cor.. @Swan_Corleone2
2K Followers 658 Following Over on @_pessimusprime. See you there you sexy mofoAna Moss @anashedidnt
3K Followers 4K Following I drink your milkshake. Wait! It doesn't have any dairy in it....right? Shit. SHIT. I explosively expel your milkshake. Sorry. You have a lovely home.'THE Fabulous' Mickie.. @MickieMarieLove
703 Followers 889 Following Post-British, Demi-Fluid, Polyamorus, Fabulous Anarchist Queer. Member TST 😈, Post Hot Topic Riot🏴☠️ Xrrl. Head Up, Horns High 🤘 (He/She/They) 💖🫂🤠CoolHTownGirl🤠 @Coolhtowngirl
26K Followers 874 Following We do grown shit over here. The Cats Meow. Soulfood Luminary✨️BB Buffay 💨🥷 @msincognito51
3K Followers 2K Following I’m ridiculous, here to laugh. Seattle Seahawks fanSir Castic @SirCasticDad42
9K Followers 8K Following I'm serious and don't call me Shirley |🖖🏻| Browncoat | 🍕🌮🥓 Fanatic https://t.co/1UhgYFL3SbRobotix 🧩 @robrecord
2K Followers 4K Following The warmest machine. Programmer; deprogrammed. Rooting for humanity. 🦚 I am another you. Be kind, be real. Protect the kids 💚kids_kubed 🇨🇦 @Kids_kubed
5K Followers 594 Following Mom of three. High school teacher. A pulse at the end of the day is success! https://t.co/2yRaTZUxxrher name is mel @Melchievous
13K Followers 4K Following slightly nerdy with a pinch of hipster - enjoys hot yoga and ice cream “a true Sicko” “has a creative approach to rhythm” “a joy” @mnRevontulet @mnThunderwallLorie @LorieGZ
7K Followers 3K Following I love to tweet things my kids say, or random funny thoughts in my head (at least they seem funny to me!) https://t.co/unZKfrArCo@MadScientistFF I have watched enough experts actually handle these things that one that small, although unpleasant if I mess up, wouldn't be enough to dissuade me. Get behind it and pin it down by the back of its head.. That said.. this only looks like a head without a body 😉
@MadScientistFF It doesn't look that big, I'd take the cash, but those better not be 1's inside that bundle
@BillyPTSD @MouthAlmighty @RachelCDailey
@secretspartacus @RachelCDailey @krissysbooked @secretspartacus so people can be rude, crass, deliberately ignorant to disabled people because they’re not disabled? By that measure men have the right to misogynistic because they’re not women. Just as I wouldn’t stand misogyny before my sight loss I won’t stand ableism now.
@krissysbooked @secretspartacus We shouldn’t have to explain it though
@secretspartacus @RachelCDailey And there are some days where we don’t have the energy to be that person and that is ok because we’re human too.
@secretspartacus @RachelCDailey But why do the disabled and chronically I’ll community have to be nice to everyone for these stupid comments? Why do we have to take the moral high ground when they overstep boundaries and be rude and entitled constantly?
@crbanebula @secretspartacus @RachelCDailey x.com/mrsrieb/status…
@BillyPTSD @RachelCDailey Wheelchair user here. I get this A LOT. And the implication is always that my life is miserable, pitiful, distressing, upsetting BECAUSE of my wheelchair. No one ever thinks what my life would be like without it, that my wheelchair is an enabling tool.
@secretspartacus @RachelCDailey Oh please do explain how is calling someone’s life miserable an act of kindness?! I’m really looking forward to this one.
@secretspartacus @RachelCDailey I can't really see how "Hi stranger going about their business who didn't ask for my opinion on anything, I'm so sorry you exist. It must be tough to exist at this time of year" can ever really be kind idk
@secretspartacus @RachelCDailey In this era they should know better and why should we have to educate and do all that for every Tom, Dick, and Harry? I was taught not to presume and keep my mouth shut if you are unsure. If you want to educate come across ok but a lot of us do not like to because it is tiresome
@pastorjkljoiner @secretspartacus @RachelCDailey Exactly. Disabled people were not put on this planet to educate other people’s ignorance. Google is free
@secretspartacus @TheScarletWit11 @RachelCDailey It's not her job to educate him.
@secretspartacus @RachelCDailey So you know it's ableist, and you speak from personal experience, but the disabled woman is in the wrong? It's for her to make accommodations for other people because she's different?
@secretspartacus so where was his?
@secretspartacus He literally accosted her in public and said something quite humiliating. She doesn’t owe him kindness
@Journo_Lydia @RachelCDailey I'm always reminded of this quote in situations like this.
@_marching_Ents_ @RachelCDailey 'at his awkwardly friendly faux pas' One of the worst takes I've ever seen.
@_marching_Ents_ @RachelCDailey What's friendly about calling someone's life awful?