missingblakes @missingblakes
Friend to people with nachos Joined June 2008-
Tweets2K
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Followers2K
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Following2K
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Likes78K
It's clear from the way they sing "five golden rings" that they prefer carats over parrots. Enough with the bird gifts already.
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Having a vegetarian Thanksgiving but have invited some carnivores? Serve them Fauxfurky, turkey with the look and taste of tofu with the look and taste of turkey.
I've watched thousands of hours of TV since the lockdown. It's the zombie apocalypse only we're eating our own brains.
Closed?!? If ever we needed them to be open, it's now. Maybe it's only good against the koronavirus.
My new bike light has many modes: full brightness, half brightness, flashing, rapid flashing, disco inferno... By the time I've cycled to the one I want it's daylight.
At what age do you tell your screenplay that it's adapted?
When I was a kid I believed in the future as depicted on Star Trek where we’d use advanced technology for discovery and exploration. Instead, we spend all day staring at our tricorders.
Free advice is typically worth you pay for it. That will be $100, please.
Terrible accident at the astrologer's. Zodiac signs everywhere. Oh, the horoscope!
Consider it done. Now reconsider because I’m not doing it. Still, wasn’t it briefly satisfying when you temporarily thought it was taken care of?
A poor craftsman blames his tools because he can't afford good tools. Vote for me and I will tax the rich craftspeople and give tools to all.
I think the big surprise about the teddy bear picnic is that they're eating at all. I thought they were stuffed.
Ever been asked a question and you find yourself agreeing with it but then it takes a strange turn and you sink into a pool of eels?
Pretty sure this is the international symbol for eating your own vomit
Why did that guy want to bring his Bonnie back? She was a habitual liar over large bodies of water.
Got my Toyota Camry detailed. Now it's an automatic 2008 Sky Blue Pearl Toyota Camry LE V6.
I like to throw & toss things in here
Joel Ingersoll 🥌 @FlyoverJoel
7K Followers 450 Following I get up and I put on pants. I wrote a book about curling. It's funny. You should buy it: https://t.co/jjFw6NDI6V
Just Norm @funnyguy
5K Followers 5K Following I'm a fake expert comedian on life. I write jokes and do stand-up and improv comedy. For entertainment purposes only.
Shane @shanethevein
17K Followers 3K Following I don't care about politics, especially yours. Padres fan. Crodie lover. I block trolls.
Marc MacKenzie @marcmack
3K Followers 758 Following Marc is a man with a dream. A very simple dream, mostly involving nachos and beer, but a dream nonetheless.
Verifried Drunk™®�... @VerifiedDrunk
27K Followers 2K Following The later the tweet, the drunker I am. it/that/drunk
Sonearnee @Sonearnee9g7To
10 Followers 491 Following
AKANE🍦 @AKANE66508845
62 Followers 937 Following 咥えたい。ぺろぺろしたい🙈 えち依存症JDのｳﾗｱｶです💙 ラインきてっ🖤▶https://t.co/XFzBBLw8Jg
Naguita @NaguitaChile
351 Followers 2K Following
Marc Wasserman, MD �... @synapse2000
3K Followers 5K Following Attending general neurologist at UC-Health. Husband, father, hiker, photographer. Tweets are my own.
Rubén (Not the Sandw... @407Creative
7K Followers 6K Following Liver transplant patient on the list for a new liver. Please consider donating any amount so my family can visit me more in the hospital. Thank you! 🔽
VISIBLE @visibleorg
496 Followers 2K Following We provide creative services free of charge to BIPOC businesses and causes, and internships to increase representation in the design industry.
cryptoinvestingpro @VideosNetwork
775 Followers 3K Following
Alicia J. Alejandre @hengvongvimean1
48 Followers 2K Following
Eternal Bird @EternalBirdCo
213 Followers 799 Following Minimalist jewellery & accessories for the urban nature lover. Handmade in Canada. Follow me on Instagram at eternalbirdco 📷All photos are my own
Mohan Paritar @MParitar
11 Followers 194 Following
Youngrep @notreadingonme
159 Followers 1K Following new account. don't follow if you are easily offended or suffer from liberalism disease.
Wubalubadubdub! @phenyx555
116 Followers 393 Following
RAMCHANDER MEHRA @RAMCHANDERMEHR1
2 Followers 84 Following
Arpit @scarneck_arpit
564 Followers 549 Following 🍿 #Movies 📈 #ProductMarketing 🏍️ #Motorcycle. Follow me on - https://t.co/eal6FZ7VPM
totallynotweeaboo @incrediblemr_d1
23 Followers 358 Following perhaps its time to venture back into the darkness with cheetos and anime
జీ యస్. శ... @prabhashankar01
294 Followers 752 Following
(pls send N U D E S) @plssendNUDESpod
170 Followers 1K Following We are a podcast about Twitter drama and the cultural realities of social media. @TheWoodenslurpy @DickScurvy Coming September 2015: It's not Just Twitter.
Brett Graham @BGraham86
10 Followers 110 Following
Legend Of Zelda @iLegendOfZelda
1K Followers 2K Following Legend of Zelda tweets and retweets for fans of the classic series #LegendOfZelda #gaming
KUDANTHAI RAMAKRISHN @kudanthairamak1
21 Followers 161 Following
srinivasarao dogupar @dsraosbh
7 Followers 53 Following
Arjun @Arjun_Gudla
4 Followers 49 Following
Melissa Francis @pillay_er
19 Followers 227 Following
Faceless Candidate @NoFaceCandidate
152 Followers 1K Following #WeAreFaceless: The grass-roots effort to remove the cult of personality from elections and politics.
Shamanth Bhardwaj @shamanthbhardw1
0 Followers 77 Following
Harpeth Trace Sally @SallyGroundhog
1K Followers 4K Following I can't think of anything to write here at the moment.
James Phoenix @jamesphoenix9
6 Followers 61 Following
Brian @bgcinkc
18 Followers 260 Following
SGC Global @iamsharawy_sgc
41 Followers 231 Following SGC is a Energy developing company, with goals to produce Energy that is eco-friendly, Efficient & 100% Effective
Tyler Schremp @TylerSchremp
34K Followers 40K Following Wannabe toy designer. Missed my 15 minutes of fame, now on the standby list.
a!v¡n is on BlueSky @enthusmiasma
1K Followers 2K Following Newspaperdy; chickentender; graphic artish; liberal Arkie; #tunegoon; Aquarius, Rat; mildly Whovian; INFP; multinontheist; Gen X; augur of doom; editorial We.
SAMMY MAINA @maina_sammy
61 Followers 249 Following
Tapskey @tapskey
1K Followers 4K Following Our service allows you to access your contacts from another phone when your phone dies. Get started with a month free!
Lucy Burningham @lucyburningham
2K Followers 1K Following Writer, author of MY BEER YEAR, Certified Cicerone®, co-author @HopintheSaddle she/her #BlackLivesMatter
Hasan Erdal @HaSaNerdaI
83 Followers 837 Following
mamdoh deeb @mamdohdeeb
35 Followers 136 Following
Scott Linnen @ScottLinnen
15K Followers 2K Following Hamburger Helper. Because a severed hand told me to.
Ken Jennings @KenJennings
419K Followers 503 Following Your Jeopardy! pal. Author of 100 PLACES TO SEE AFTER YOU DIE (https://t.co/pxwTQ2d7lo) and a bunch of other stuff. OMNIBUS co-founder (https://t.co/aURWrO4dAO).
Elizabeth Hackett @LizHackett
76K Followers 1K Following Screenwriter. Redhead. Frequent eater of toast.
Joel Ingersoll 🥌 @FlyoverJoel
7K Followers 450 Following I get up and I put on pants. I wrote a book about curling. It's funny. You should buy it: https://t.co/jjFw6NDI6V
Just Norm @funnyguy
5K Followers 5K Following I'm a fake expert comedian on life. I write jokes and do stand-up and improv comedy. For entertainment purposes only.
Shane @shanethevein
17K Followers 3K Following I don't care about politics, especially yours. Padres fan. Crodie lover. I block trolls.
Marc MacKenzie @marcmack
3K Followers 758 Following Marc is a man with a dream. A very simple dream, mostly involving nachos and beer, but a dream nonetheless.
Verifried Drunk™®�... @VerifiedDrunk
27K Followers 2K Following The later the tweet, the drunker I am. it/that/drunk
Brian Gaar @briangaar
74K Followers 2K Following https://t.co/z1EDZmqdBo Bluesky: https://t.co/XkLVhTtCfv Read my stuff at: https://t.co/e9CGIwhVgN
NERAX Cask Festivals @NERAX
2K Followers 462 Following The New England Real Ale eXhibition is the longest running cask-conditioned beer festival in the US.
Wash Co Scanner @WashCoScanner
54K Followers 5K Following Mix of the serious & sometimes crazy stuff heard on the Washington County, OR scanner ~NOT CONFIRMED INFO ~ Retweets ≠ endorsements
Laurie Kilmartin @anylaurie16
99K Followers 6K Following Standup / comedy writer / Book “Dead People Suck” / Hulu “Cis Woke Grief Sl*t"
Your Worst Nightmare @whyrobynwhy
3K Followers 1K Following Given the opportunity, I would destroy David Schwimmer in a pudding eating contest.
Amber Flannery Field @AmericasComic
10K Followers 1K Following I run punk shows at a church practicing Quaker • only good tour guide in New York City "Tik" "tok" "famous"
wayne something @waynedorg
23 Followers 290 Following not a bot just a reader of fine diatribe with a hint of reality
Harry Myers VO @PeasOneDay
4K Followers 2K Following Voice actor in A Plague Tale Requiem; Diablo IV; Darktide; Horizon Zero Dawn; Baldur’s Gate 3; The Sandman; Dragonflight; & more. Opinions mine. https://t.co/cJ7eWZ6ZwQ
Brian @bgcinkc
18 Followers 260 Following
Tyler Schremp @TylerSchremp
34K Followers 40K Following Wannabe toy designer. Missed my 15 minutes of fame, now on the standby list.
Lucy Burningham @lucyburningham
2K Followers 1K Following Writer, author of MY BEER YEAR, Certified Cicerone®, co-author @HopintheSaddle she/her #BlackLivesMatter
Ben Wexler @mrbenwexler
48K Followers 644 Following Writer/producer: The Grinder, The Comedians, Community, Arrested Development
jess (retired) @jessokfine
13K Followers 382 Following Extremely Powerful Witch. former trademark holder: Cow Facts™️. Thanks for the memories ❤️
Glenn Dallas @Glennmandirect
5K Followers 5K Following Scribbler. Puzzle guy. Dungeon Master / Game Master / Storyteller. Roustabout. Intergalactic do-gooder. Author, with @lisamantchev, of Sugar Skulls (Skyscape)
Gary Cooper @garycooper90
303 Followers 971 Following Aspiring Evil Genius bent on World Domination.
Dave Chiasson @DavePossum68
118 Followers 932 Following
Craving @calluptome
15K Followers 4K Following wifey @JaymianaJones & I have seen it all- film twitter - where’s my voodoo doll https://t.co/j1tRiOtekK
Julie Rogue (~_~;) @julierogue
272 Followers 696 Following Veterinarian, wife, mother, tired. Obviously starved for virtual attention. Do you like my Disney 1994 Julie avi?
Tony Clarke @TCxxxx
21 Followers 43 Following
Paul Rudd's Nuts! @Jimboleem
3K Followers 4K Following I only tweet using my penis. I also only tweet on the bus. (oh yeah... I have terminal cancer.) (link to My first CD) https://t.co/8K9gBKjOA2
Viktor Winetrout @Cpin42
24K Followers 563 Following Creator of @Sorrowscopes & @WeirdCelebTwets https://t.co/fJ5BJjLtIb
Line Art Lionheart @notalogin
4K Followers 621 Following Inert nerd alert. Top tweets: https://t.co/XcxWtLjgVQ
Ethan Scott @TheEthanScott
141 Followers 56 Following
Jimmy koz @named_bort219
228 Followers 1K Following
coltyn. tetz @c_tetz
57 Followers 179 Following
Lance @jsquigglez
78 Followers 1K Following It's like trying to tell a stranger about the abandoned Kohl's 🎶
hey lee @hhmcc_
316 Followers 360 Following
Shaker శంకర P... @50415ee5cd6f4f3
46 Followers 289 Following
Preggers in RV @PreggersinRV
95 Followers 64 Following Two strangers, one fetus, an RV and the open road. Part of @ComedyCoup and looking forward to the journey!
jeff heney @jheney65
1K Followers 2K Following just whatever stupid shit happens to be on my twisted mind at the time, just jokes, don't take this shit serious! INFIDEL!
Brian Incognito @BrianIncognito
10K Followers 8K Following I surround myself with people who know to leave me alone. Seeker of original thinking.
Sandra Newman @sannewman
30K Followers 4K Following Author of various novels: JULIA, THE MEN, THE HEAVENS, THE COUNTRY OF ICE CREAM STAR, etc. Also co-author of HOW NOT TO WRITE A NOVEL. She/they
Finishing Moves² @finishingtv
162 Followers 193 Following A washed up wrestler moves in with his younger brother, high maintenance sister-in-law, and their newly mixed family. http://t.co/ajGIdbax2U
Reid Price @Reid_Price
2K Followers 458 Following (Hey/Hi 👋) ♟️👑 Rob Shandon on #SullivansCrossing & Tom the Bartender on #From #Fromily 💉Donate Blood💉 https://t.co/cMilsElrXY
metalmaggie1969 @metalmaggie1969
684 Followers 1K Following Dark and twisted, Foo Fighters roadie wannabe, horror movie addict, Metallica fan, therapist.
Hannah Gray P. @unickornfredd
224 Followers 1K Following It isn't enough for me to succeed, others should fail. I'm okay with that. I'm normal I guess. لماذا أنت تضيع وقتك ترجمة
FLICKERS! @FlickersTV
2K Followers 2K Following NEW SHOW for fans of Tim & Eric and Wonder Showzen, featuring Weird @alyankovic! Official FLICKERS @CBC @ComedyCoup twitter. http://t.co/zg0l5GF6fP
Gabby Hayes @RealGabbyHayes
2K Followers 1K Following Old Sourdough, Prospector, Moonshine drinker. Writer for Fine Bunkhouse Livin' and 49er Style.
Lord Pinky @HiddenPinky
3K Followers 711 Following I'm a pony, not a brony. Stable genius. Also at @hiddenpinky.bsky.socialTrends for United States
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